Writing an Effective Personal Profile

WritinganEffectivePersonalProfile

Scholarshipapplications,personalprofilesandsupplementalinformation(whenrequired)arereviewed
byascholarshipcommitteecomprisedofUAfacultyand/orstaff.Dependingonhowmanyscholarships
eachapplicantiseligiblefor,manyapplicationsarereviewedbymultiplecommittees.Thecommittees’
taskistomatchthescholarshipprogramwithascholar.Directthereaders.Whyareyoutheexemplary
choicetoreceiveascholarship?

Committeeswillevaluatethefollowing:leadership,extracurricularinvolvement,presentation(grammar,
punctuation,etc),youreducationalandcareergoalsandplans,andanyspecialcircumstances(i.e.other
informationyoufeelthecommitteeshouldknowaboutyouoryourapplication).Touchuponeachof
thosecriterionsinyourpersonalprofileandgointoasmuchdetailasyoucanwithinthe3000character
(approximately500word)limit.It isstronglyrecommendedthatyoucomposeyourprofileinaword
processingprogramsuchasMicrosoftWord,andthencopyandpasteintotheboxprovidedinUAOnline.

Effectiveprofilessuccessfullydothefollowing:
Giveinsightaboutwhoyouare.Theyshowuswhoyouare,howyouthink,howyoudecidetoact(ornot
act)uponsomething,howyouapproachaproblemordilemma,howyouinteractwithyourenvironment.
Avoidbeingmelancholy!Youdohavesomethinginterestingtowriteabout.Don’twritearesume(unless
askedfor);letusknowwhatmakesyoustandoutamongsttheotherapplicants.Yourpersonalprofileis
readbycommitteemembersmakingscholarshiprecommendationssotakethetimetoputyourbestfoot
forward.

ProfileBrainstorms:
Describeactivitiesyouareinvolvedinthatrelatetoyoureducationalplanoryourfuturecareer.
Describeascholasticachievementyouhavemade,andwhyitisimportanttoyou.
Describecontributionsyouhavemadetoyourcommunityand/orcampusandexplainhowthose
experienceshavecontributedtoyourpersonalgrowth.
Pickanexperiencefromyourownlifeandexplainhowithasinfluencedyourdevelopment.
Wheredoyouseeyourself10yearsfromnow?


Othertips:
o Youmaychooseatopicthat200otherstudentswriteabout(whichisfine).Buthowyouwrite
aboutyourtopiccandistinguishyouressayfromthepack.
o Writelogicallywherethereadercanfollowyourtrainofthought.Makesureyoursentences
relatetoeachother.Usetransitionswhenachangetakesplaceinyourstoryoryouaremakinga
newpoint.
o Avoidredundantsentencesandphrases.
o Useyourownvoice;youdon’tneedtoimpressbyusingesotericjargonorvocabulary.Readers
detectpretensionwhenreadingonemile‐sizemultisyllabicwordafteranother,whichmakesthe
writinglesscompelling.However,itisagoodideatoconsultadictionaryandthesaurustofind
therightwordsthatconveyyourideaswithprecision.Gooddictionstrengthensessays.
o Writewhatyouknow.Ifyouaretryingtoimpressthecommitteebywritingonacomplicated
subjectmatterbutyouarenotpassionatenorknowlittleaboutit,thereadercanpickuponthis
andyouressaymayseemdisingenuous.
o Useappropriatelanguage.Keepinmindyouraudience–scholarshipcommitteememberswho
mustchoosetherightscholarforthescholarshipprogram.

Genericstatementsdon’trevealwhyyouareunique.Usedetailed,vividdescriptionstoproducedistinct
mentalimagesofyourstory.Herearesomeexamplestoillustratethispoint:

Genericstatement:“Beingchosenascaptainofthesoccerteammadememoremature.”
Analternativedescription:WhatIlearnedfrombeingthecaptainofthesoccerteamwashowto
motivateandencourageotherseffectivelywhensituationsseemedhopeless.

GenericStatement:Mymomisthemostinfluentialpersoninmylife.SheissupportiveineverythingIdo
andsheisagreatrolemodel.ItrytoemulateherandfollowherteachingsineverythingIpursue.
Here’sanalternativedescription:Iwanttoraisemychildrenlikemymotherdid.Mymomneveruseda
guilttriptoteachmewrongfromright.WhenItoldherin4thgrade,“Ididn’tneedtopractice“Silent
Night”formyorganplayingdebutatMidnightMassshemerelyasked,“Haveyouthoughtthisidea
through?”Ithoughtitwasabrilliantplantokeepme“fresh”,soIsaid,“yes,”withouthesitation.My

nervesgotthebestofmethatnight,andIstartedonthewrongnote,stumblingthroughthefinger
patternsofthesong,andcompletelyplayedthepieceoffkey.Icouldn’thelpbutseeteensintheaudience
shakingintheirseats,tryingtostifletheirlaughs.AfterIplayedthefinalnote,Iran/walkedtositnextto
mymom,who smiledatmeandenfoldedmeinahugepewhug.Afterwards,Iwasdespondent;yet,my
motherkeptbeamingwithpridethatIcompletedthefullsonginfrontof300people.Sheneverletonif
shewasembarrassedorifshewasembarrassedforme.Shedidn’tneedtoremindmethatpracticewould
havemadetheexperiencelessharrowing.Butsheknewhowtousethepowerofshame.WhenIcameout
ofourbathroomonemorning,myravenhairbleachedtowhiteandmybrownpupilssheeredoverby
violetcontacts,mymom’sfacewentpaleandimmediatelyflushedtomaroon.Shepacedbetweenour
narrowhallwayfivetimes,andsimplyasked,“Whyhaveyouerasedyourgrandmother’sfeaturesfrom
you?Areyousoashamedofyourheritage?”Ifeltthedisappointmentofgenerationswithherwordsand
hercurtdeliverystunnedme.Ithencriedandcouldn’tbelievewhatIhaddonetomyself.BeforeIcould
runbackintothebathroomtocorrectmyappearance,shelatchedontotheedgeofmyshirtandforced
medownstairswhereafamilyreunionwasgatheringtocelebratemygrandmother’s75thbirthday.My
newlookattractedquestioningstaresandjokefodderfrommyfamily.Witheachembarrassing
explanationandglancesofshame,mymothermademeaccountableformyactionsandtaughtmethe
impactofmydecisionandbehaviorthatday.Asinthisepisode,mymompasseddowneffective
life‐learningteachingmethodsthatIhopeIcanemulatewithequalpatienceandwisdomformyown
children.

WorksConsulted:
CollegeBoard“CollegeEssayWritingTips:WriteanEffectiveApplicationEssay”
/>
NorlinScholarsProgram“TipsforWritingScholarshipEssaysandGettingStrongLettersof
Recommendation” />