The 5 second rule transform your life, work, and confidence with everyday courage

ASAVIOREPUBLICBOOK
The5SecondRule:
TransformYourLife,Work,andConfidencewithEverydayCourage
©2017byMelRobbins
AllRightsReserved
ISBN:978-1-68261-238-5
ISBN(eBook):978-1-68261-239-2
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InteriorCompositionbyGregJohnson/TextbookPerfect
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THISISTHETRUESTORYOF

THE5SECONDRULE
WHATitis,WHYitworks,andHOWpeoplearoundtheworldare
usingittochangetheirlivesinfivesimpleseconds.
Theeventsdescribedinthisbookarereal.
Nonameshavebeenchanged.
Thesocialmediapoststhatappearthroughoutthisbookarethe
actualposts.
Icannotwaittosharethisbookwithyouandwatchyouunlockthe
powerofyou.

5...4...3...2...1...GO!
Xo,

Mel


THE5SECONDRULE
TRANSFORMYOURLIFE,WORK,ANDCONFIDENCE
WITHEVERYDAYCOURAGE

THE5SECONDRULE
1. FiveSecondsToChangeYourLife
2. HowIDiscoveredthe5SecondRule
PART

1

3. WhatYouCanExpectWhenYouUseIt
4. WhyTheRuleWorks
THEPOWEROFCOURAGE
5. EverydayCourage
6. WhatAreYouWaitingFor?

PART

2

7. You’llNeverFeelLikeIt
8. HowToStartUsingtheRule
COURAGECHANGESYOURBEHAVIOR
HowtoBecometheMostProductivePersonYou
Know

PART

3

9. ImproveYourHealth
10. IncreaseProductivity
11. EndProcrastination


COURAGECHANGESYOURMIND
HowtoBecometheHappiestPersonYouKnow
12. StopWorrying
PART

4

13. EndAnxiety
14. BeatFear
COURAGECHANGESEVERYTHING
How To Become the Most Fulfilled Person You
Know

PART

5

15. BuildingRealConfidence
16. PursuingPassion
17. EnrichYourRelationships

THEPOWEROFYOU


EverydayCourage
Courage is the ability to do things that feel
difficult,scary,oruncertain.
Itisn’treservedforjustachosenfew.
Courageisabirthright.It’sinsideallofus.
Andit’swaitingforyoutodiscoverit.
One moment of courage can change your day.
One day can change your life. And one life can
changetheworld.
That’s the true power of courage; it reveals you.
Thegreatestversionofyou.
Discoveryourcourage,andyouwillbecapableof
accomplishing and experiencing anything you
dreamabout.
Yes,evenchangingtheworld.


PART1
THE5SECONDRULE


CHAPTERONE

FIVESECONDSTOCHANGEYOUR
LIFE

Y

ou are about to learn something remarkable—it takes just five seconds to
changeyourlife.Soundslikeagimmick,doesn’tit?It’snot.It’sscience.I’ll

proveittoyou.Youchangeyourlifeonefive-seconddecisionatatime.Infact,it’s
theonlywayyouchange.
Thisisthetruestoryof the5SecondRule:whatitis,whyitworks,andhowit
hastransformedthelivesof peoplearoundtheworld.TheRuleiseasytolearnand
itsimpactisprofound.It’sthesecrettochanginganything.OnceyoulearntheRule,
youcanstartusingitimmediately.TheRulewillhelpyoulive,love,work,andspeak
withgreaterconfidenceandcourageeveryday.Useitonceandit’llbethereforyou
wheneveryouneedit.


I created the 5 Second Rule at a time in my life when everything was falling
apart.Andbyeverything,Imeaneverything:mymarriage,finances,career,andselfesteemwereallinthegutter.Myproblemsseemedsobigthatitwasastruggleeach
morningjusttogetoutof bed.That’sactuallyhowtheRulebegan—Iinventedthe
Ruletohelpmebreakmyhabitof hittingthesnoozebutton.
WhenIusedtheRulefortheveryfirsttimesevenyearsago,Ithoughtitwas
silly.LittledidIknowthatIhadinventedapowerfulmetacognitiontechniquethat
wouldchangeabsolutelyeverythingaboutmylife,work,andsenseof self.
What’shappenedtomesincediscoveringthe5SecondRuleandthepowerof
five second decisions is unbelievable. I not only woke up—I shook up my entire
life. I’ve used this one tool to take control and improve everything from my
confidencetomycashflow,mymarriagetomycareer,andmyproductivitytomy
parenting.Ihavegonefrombouncingcheckstosevenfiguresinthebankandfrom
fightingwithmyhusbandtocelebrating20yearsof marriage.I’vecuredmyself of
anxiety, built and sold two small businesses, been recruited to join the teams at

CNNandSUCCESSmagazine,andI’mnowoneof themost-bookedspeakersin
theworld.I’veneverfeltmoreincontrol,happy,orfree.Icouldn’thavedoneany
of itwithouttheRule.
The5SecondRulechangedeverything…byteachingmejustonething:
HOWtochange.
UsingtheRule,Ireplacedmytendencytooverthinkthesmallestmoveswitha
bias toward action. I used the Rule to master self-monitoring and become more
present and productive. The Rule taught me how to stop doubting and start
believinginmyself,myideas,andmyabilities.And,theRulehasgivenmetheinner
strengthtobecomeabetterandmuchhappierperson,notforothers,butforme.
TheRulecandothesameforyou.That’swhyIamsoexcitedtoshareitwith
you.Inthenextfewchapters,you’lllearnthestorybehindtheRule,whatitis,why


itworks,andthecompellingsciencetobackitup.You’lldiscoverhowfivesecond
decisions and acts of everyday courage change your life. Finally, you’ll learn how
you can use the #5SecondRule in combination with the latest research-backed
strategiestobecomehealthier,happier,andmoreproductiveandeffectiveatwork.
You’llalsolearnhowtouseittoendworry,manageanxiety,findmeaninginyour
lifeandbeatanyfear.
And, that’s not all. You’ll see proof. Lots of proof. This book is packed with
socialmediapostsandfirst-handaccountsfrompeopleallovertheworldwhoare
using the Rule to make some amazing things happen. Yes, the Rule will help you
wake up on time, but what it really does is something far more remarkable—it
wakesuptheinnergenius,leader,rockstar,athlete,artist,andchangeagent
insideof you.
WhenyoufirstlearntheRule,you’lllikelystartusingittosticktoyourgoals.
Youmightuse the Rule to push yourself to get to the gym like Margaret does
whensheisn’t“feelingit.”

OryoumayusetheRuletobecomemoreinfluentialatwork.That’s how
MalfirstusedtheRule—tofindthecouragetomeetwithhisbossandtalkabout
hiscareergoals(somethingthatsomanyof usfear).ThankstotheRule,itnotonly
happened,butitwentgreat:


That’sanotherthingthat’suniqueabouttheRule—Imayhavecreatedit,butit’s
notjustmystorytotell.Insidethisbook,you’llmeetpeoplearoundtheworldfrom
all walks of life who are using the Rule, in ways big and small, to take charge of
theirlives.Theirdiverseexperienceswillhelpyouunderstandjusthowlimitlessthe
applicationsfortheRuleanditsbenefitstrulyare.
You can use the Rule to become more productive. Before the 5 Second
Rule, Laura used to make endless to-do lists and sat around making excuses and
being a jerk to herself. Now, there’s no room in Laura’s life for excuses—only
action.Laurahasincreasedhercashflowby$4,000amonth,finishedherbachelor’s
degree,andhikedafew4,000footers.Nextup,runamarathon.


YoucanusetheRuletostepoutsideof yourcomfortzoneandbecome
more effective at networking. Ken used the 5 Second Rule the same day he
learned it at the Project Management Institute National Conference to meet


“movers and shakers,” Matthew used it to cold-call C-Level executives, and Alan
usedittomeet“adozenfolksIwouldn’thaveotherwise”ataPGATourevent.


You can also use the Rule to self-monitor and control your emotions.
JennausestheRuleasamomtopractice“patienceinsteadof snappingat”herkids.

She’salsousingitasasalestoolinhernewdirectsellingbusiness.TheRulehelps
herstopthinkingabouthow“intimidating”itistosellandgivesherthecourageto
juststartselling.


Executives inside some of the world’s most respected brands areusing
the Rule to help their managers change, drive sales, engage teams, and
innovate. Take Crystal at USAA, whose entire sales team is using the 5 Second
Ruleandtheresulthasbeenawesome—they’vejumpedto“#1inourlocation.”


The#5SecondRuleissoeasytolearnandsoimportantforconfidencethatwe
seemanagers,likeMuz,teachingittotheirteamsallovertheworld.


You’ll also be inspired by the stories of people who are finding the
couragetostopthinkingandstartputtingtheirideasintoaction.Mark,who
afterdecadesof thinkingaboutstartinganonprofiticehockeyleagueforinnercity
kids,usedtheRuletofinallygettheidea“outof myhead”and“intoaction.”He’s
now partnered with former Olympians and NHL alumni to create camps, clinics,
andleagues.


The Rule is also a powerful tool in the battles of addiction and
depression.Billlearnedaboutthe#5SecondRuleonaRedditthreadanditwasthe
“Rightmessage.Rightplace.Righttime.”HestartedusingtheRule’s“countdown
trick” to quit drinking and it’s working “amazing!!” He just celebrated his 40th
birthdaycompletelysober.

AnditmightevensaveyourlifeAworkcolleagueof minerecentlyreached
outandsharedaverypoignant#5SecondRulestorywithme.Afterheandhiswife
splitup,hefellintoadeepdepression.Itgotsobadthathe“contemplatedsuicide.”
Athislowestpoint,heusedtheRuleto“putitdownandcallforhelp.”Findingthe
couragetogetoutof hisheadbycounting5-4-3-2-1andthencallingforhelp
savedhislife.


InusingtheRuleformorethansevenyears,andhearingfrompeopleallover
the world, I’ve come to realize that every single day we face moments that are
difficult,uncertain,andscary.Yourliferequirescourage.Andthatisexactlywhat
theRulewillhelpyoudiscover—thecouragetobecomeyourgreatestself.

HowCanOneSimpleToolWorkinSoMany
PowerfulWays?
Greatquestion.The#5SecondRuleisonlyeverworkingononething—YOU.
Youhavegreatnessinsideof you.Evenatyourlowestpoint,greatnessisthere.The
Rulewillgiveyouboththeclaritytohearthatgreatnessandthecouragetoacton
it.
Using the Rule, I have discovered the courage to do things that I had spent
yearsthinkingaboutandmakingexcusesfor.OnlythroughactionhaveIunlocked
thepowerinsideof metobecomethepersonthatI’vealwayswantedtobe.And
the confidence I exhibit on TV, online, and on stage is what I call “Real
Confidence.”


I’vebuiltRealConfidencebylearninghowtohonormyinstinctswithactionso
thattheycometolifeintherealworld.Iusetheword“honor”onpurpose.That’s
what you are doing when you use the Rule. You are honoring yourself. You are
championingyourideas.Andeachtimeyouuseit,youtakeonestepclosertobeing

thepersonyouaretrulymeanttobe.Ihavechangedfromthekindof personwho
just thinks about my ideas to having the confidence to share, act on, and pursue
them.If youusetheRuleconsistentlyandyouhonoryourinstinctswithaction,the
exactsametransformationwillhappentoyou.
Marlowe discovered just how easy it is to use the Rule to transform herself.
Days after learning the Rule, she used it to stop thinking about signing up for
classesandactuallydoit,whichwassomethingshe“hadbeenwantingtodobut
keptmakingexcusesfor,foralongtime.”


AsMarloweputit,“it’sabsolutelyincredibleandawe-inspiringhoweasythings
becomeonceyouwrapyourheadaroundyourownabilitytoPUSHyourself.”
She’s right. Once you start using the Rule to push yourself out of your head
and into action, you’ll be “astonished” by how easy it is to make a five second
decisionthatchangeseverything.
AsIusedtheRulemoreandmoreinmylife,IrealizedthatIwasmakingsmall
decisionsalldaylongthatheldmeback.Infivesecondsflat,I’ddecidetostayquiet,
to wait, and not to risk it. I’d have an instinct to act and within five seconds my


mindwouldkillitwithdoubt,excuses,worry,orfear.Iwastheproblemandin
five seconds, I could push myself and become the solution. The secret to
changehadbeenrightinfrontof myfacetheentiretime—fivesecondsdecisions.
HaveyoueverseenthatfamouscommencementaddressDavidFosterWallace
gaveatKenyonCollegein2005?If youhaven’tseenorreadthisspeech,youcan
finditonYouTubeandit’sdefinitelyworththe20minutesittakestowatch.
Init,Wallacestepsuptothemicandstartsoff withthisjoke:
Therearethesetwoyoungfishswimmingalong,andtheyhappentomeetanolderfishswimmingtheotherway,whonods
atthemandsays,“Morning,boys,how’sthewater?”
Andthetwoyoungfishswimonforabit,andtheneventuallyoneof themlooksoverattheotherandgoes,“What

thehelliswater?”

You can hear the audience laugh in the video, and then Wallace explains the
immediatepointof thefishstoryisthat“themostobvious,importantrealitiesareoftenthe
onesthatarethehardesttoseeandtalkabout.”
Forme,thehardestthingtoseeandtalkaboutwastheverynatureof change
itself. I had always wondered why it was so damn hard to make myself do the
things that I knew I should do in order to expand my career, enrich my
relationships, become healthier, and improve my life. Discovering the
#5SecondRule gave me the million-dollar answer—change comes down to the
courageyouneedeverydaytomakefiveseconddecisions.

YouAreOneDecisionAwayfromaCompletely
DifferentLife
Insidethisbook,I’mgoingtoshareeverythingthatI’velearnedaboutchange
and the power of everyday courage. You’re going to love what you are about to
learn.ThecoolestpartwillbewhenyoustarttousetheRuleandseetheresultsfor


yourself.Youwillnotonlywakeupandrealizejusthowmuchyou’veheldyourself
back.Youwillalsoawakenthepowerthat’sbeeninsideof youallalong.
As you read the stories inside these pages, you might even realize that you’ve
usedthe#5SecondRulebefore.If youlookbackonyourlifeandreflectonsome
of the most important moments, I guarantee that you’ve made a life-changing
decisionpurelyoninstinct.Infivesecondsflat,youmade,whatIcall,a“heart-first
decision.”Youignoredyourfearsandletyourcourageandyourconfidencespeak
foryou.Fivesecondsof couragemakesallthedifference.
Just ask Catherine. When she first learned about the #5SecondRule at her
company’sexecutiveleadershipoffsite,itmadeherrealizeshehadusedtheRuleto
makeoneof themostimportantdecisionsof herlife—shejustdidn’trealizeitat

thetime.In1990,hersisterTracywaskilledandCatherinetraveledbackhometo
help. That’s when “a 5 Second decision” changed not only her life “but so many
others as well.” She decided to raise her sister’s “two little ones” who were “left
behind”whenTracydied.