HOW TO USE “PEER FEEDBACK” EFFECTIVELY TO IMPROVE WRITING SKILL FOR 10TH GRADERS AT THIEU HOA HIGH SCHOOL

THANH HOA DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION AND TRAINING

THIEU HOA HIGH SCHOOL

EXPERIENCE INITIATIVE

HOW TO USE “PEER FEEDBACK” EFFECTIVELY TO
IMPROVE WRITING SKILL FOR 10TH GRADERS AT THIEU
HOA HIGH SCHOOL

The author: Trinh Thi Loan
Job position: Teacher
Subject: English

THANH HOÁ – 2019

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I. INTRODUCTION
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1. Rationale for the study
Writing is wildly viewed as a process and it requires contributions of time
from teachers and students in order for it to achieve satisfactory results. These
days, there have been a lot of techniques recommended to boost students’
writing competence. From my teaching experience, I am convinced that giving
writing feedback is of great importance because feedback is considered an
indispensable component of instructing and learning process, the
implementation of effective feedback, therefore, plays a key role in improving

students’ writing skill.
Unfortunately, in reality, assessing or grading writing papers and
providing students with feedback in overcrowded classrooms has become a real
challenge for teachers in my rural teaching context. In some classrooms, for
example, the student to teacher ratio is 100-150 students per teacher. Teaching in
such overpopulated classrooms limits the feedback the teachers can provide to
students so opportunities to receive it are often scarce in classrooms. This is
certainly the case in large language learning classes at my school.
Another factor posing a challenge for promoting students’ writing
development of is that teachers have limited time to grade students’ papers. This
often means students receive feedback long after completing a written task,
making it hard for them to work on their weaknesses and improve on their
strengths before completing subsequent writing assignments. Receiving
feedback late definitely does not help students learn better.
This practical situation raises a big question is that “how can teachers
provide their students with credible and timely feedback?” Peer feedback may
represent one way of responding to this question. I have applied this kind of
feedback in my writing classes for long enough to assure its great significance in
motivating students’ participation, cultivating their critical thinking and
developing their ability of self-regulated learning. Students become
information-and-assistance providers for they have sufficient time, energy and
resource. It is especially applicable to large-size English classes in school.
The above reasons have inspired me to conduct my initiative with the title
“How to use peer feedback effectively to improve writing skill for 10 th graders
at Thieu Hoa high school” with the hope of sharing my experience about using
peer feedback in teaching writing skill.
2. Objectives of research
2.1. For the students
- Provide learners with an overview of how to perform peer feedback in writing
exercises.

- Help students to enable to find the mistakes in the writing papers and correct
them quickly and effectively.
2.2. For the teachers
- Find out the most effective methods to improve students’ writing skill in
general and the method of applying peer feedback in detail.
- Know how to stimulate students to improve their writing skills.
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3. Research methodology
I write this topic based on:
- The method of studying theory.
- The method of investigating.
- Applying the topic to real teaching English at Thieu Hoa high school.
- Comparison, collation and summary of the result, effect of the topic.
4. Scope of research
The scope of this study is limited to “peer feedback” carried out in writing
lessons in English 10 at high school. It explores the strengths and limitation of
peer feedback in teaching and learning writing skill, the real situation of giving
written corrective peer feedback at my school and how to make use of peer
feedback to improve writing skill for 10th graders.
II. PROBLEM SOLVING
1. Theoretical background and practical background
1. 1. Theoretical background
Writing, unlike speaking, is not an ability we acquire naturally, even in
our first language - it has to be taught. Writing is a system for interpersonal
communication using various styles of language (Jalaludin, 2011). It plays a
fundamental role in our personal and professional lives. In academia, writing has
become central as a measure for academic success.
Giving feedback in writing is an activity after students have written a

complete draft of a paper, but while there is still time for substantial revision or
it can be carried out in the post-writing.
Peer feedback means feedback from your fellow students. If you are
working on the same assignment as another student, peer feedback can mean
exchanging drafts and comments on each others' drafts. Providing peer feedback
can better students’ own writing skill. By giving feedback to friends, students
often begin to think more flexibly about their own writings. This experience will
promote the student’s ability to take the grader’s perspective when they
feedback their own work before submitting it for a grade. Furthermore, peer
feedback gives students responsibility for critiquing writing (and thinking),
rather than putting all the responsibility on teachers. The hope is that they will
internalize this process and carry it on independently, to the benefit of their
future work.
1. 2. Practical background
Most of the teachers at my school consider peer feedback as an ineffective
technique for improving students' writing and prefer teacher feedback to peer
feedback. They believe that teachers are only ones who have high knowledge to
provide feedback to students' writing and peer feedback is time-consuming.
Until now hardly have English teachers at high school in my province used peer
feedback in teaching writing skill and students are generally not used to giving
or receiving peer feedback during a writing lesson. I met with a lot of
disapproval when I told my colleagues about my intention of applying peer
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feedback in a writing lesson. They suppose there is not enough time for peer
feedback. They have been following these procedures when teaching writing
lessons.
A traditional writing lesson plan at my high school includes:
I . Warm-up. (5 minutes): Games or checking the old lesson.

II. Pre – writing. (12 minutes)
Prewriting is the preparation the teacher and students do before students
begin to draft the paper. In this stage, vocabulary is taught and structure or
format is prsented. Usually, some tasks designed in the textbook are carried out.
III. While – writing. (13minutes)
Students begin to put the paper in paragraph form. They may write their
papers individually, in pairs or in groups. Teachers observe and help.
IV. Post – Writing.( 10 minutes )
Teacher gives feedback. The more time the teacher has, the more papers
he / she gives feedback to.
V. Homework. (5 minutes)
Here are the results after students in class in 10 th form (10B) when they
were required to write a paragraph (100 words) about their daily activities when
the teacher follows the traditional writing lesson plans. This test was done at the
beginning of the school year.
Class Number of students 8.0 – 10.0
6.5 - 7.0
5.0 – 6.0
<5.0
10 B
40
5 ( 12,5 % ) 5 ( 12,5 % ) 10 ( 25% ) 20 (50 %)
I have observed a lot of such writing lessons and I wondered how I can
get students more involved and active, how I can make writing lessons more
learner- centred, and how to shift the focus of activity from the teacher to the
learners because teaching activities, after all, should focus on learners,
considering learners as the center of teaching and cognition process.
2. Applying peer feedback in writing lessons at Thieu Hoa high school.
2.1.Difficulty
Many students were too shy to pronounce a judgment on their peers’

writing. They might not desire to hurt a partner’s feelings or simply their
inexperience with providing constructive criticism on a peer’s work. Besides,
some students might not know how to comment on one another’s writing
constructively because over the years they have not received helpful feedback
from teachers grading their papers. In addition, many students are likely to
assume that it is only the teacher’s feedback that “counts.” Even when they take
seriously feedback provided by their peers, students often do not know how to
incorporate that feedback when they revise their papers. To respond to the
challenges described above, I read a lot of books, articles on the internet and
come up with some strategies that I find useful in my application of peer
feedback.
2.2. Key Strategies
Firstly, I identified and taught the skills required for peer feedback. I listed
the skills that students should learn and put into practice when participating in
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peer feedback such as writing skills (writing clear, specific comments and
questions), and collaboration skills (phrasing critiques in a descriptive,
constructive way).
Secondly, I developed checklists and guidelines for students to use when
they evaluate their peers’ written work in terms of some certain aspects of
language such as grammar, syntax, vocabulary and learning strategy and bore in
my mind that peer feedback becomes questionable if students are asked to
allocate grades to their peers. Therefore, grades should be the teacher’s
responsibility because peers do not like being accountable for misjudging their
peers.
Thirdly, I taught peer feedback as a vital part of the writing process. I
reminded students that the process of producing academic and professional
writing generally involves three steps: drafting, revising, and editing. Peer

feedback is often most helpful to student writers when it is utilized between the
drafting and revision stages, or after each student has produced a complete draft,
but while there is still time to make substantial changes. A writer might learn
from peer-feedbackers. The purpose of peer feedback as a prelude to revision is
to help the writer determine which parts of the paper are effective, and which are
unclear, incomplete, or unconvincing.
Lastly, I described peer feedback as an opportunity for students to learn
how to write for an authentic audience and defined the role of the peer
feedbacker as that of a reader, not an evaluator. Participating in peer feedback
can help them learn to shape their written language as a medium of
communication with readers.
2.3 Procedures of conducting peer feedback in the study.
2.3.1. Preparations
2.3.1. 1. Determining how peer feedback would fit into the course.
Before applying feedback to writing lessons, I decided in which writing
lessons in the course would include a peer-feedback session. I gave the time that
was required to conduct peer-feedback sessions successfully, in Tieng Anh 10,
peer feedback would work best in about 10 minutes. Then I decided when peerfeedback sessions would occur. The ideal time for peer feedback is after students
have written a complete draft of a paper, but while there is still time for
substantial revision. I looked over my course schedule, made time for a “mock”
peer-feedback session before I asked students to feedback one another’s writing,
so that they could learn to identify and began practicing the skills necessary for
peer feedback.
2.3.1. 2. Designing peer-feedback worksheets for peer-feedback session.
These worksheets (Peer Feedback Worksheet) should include specific tasks that
are suitable for students’ levels and feedbackers can complete during the session.
I often provide students guiding questions or checklists to use when they
evaluate their peers’ written work. Besides, I often demonstrate to students what
to focus on and how to communicate about their peers’ written papers.
Here is an example of a set of guiding question I used for peer feedback in the

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unit 1: writing a narrative
Narrative writing rating scale: Type of Evaluation:
peer (Circle one):
Item

Good, ok or not yet

The story has a well-thought-out setting.
The story has well-thought-out characters.
The story has a conflict.
The story has a solution to the conflict.
The writing contains correct capitalization.
The writing contains correct punctuation.
The writing contains words that are correctly spelled
Comments:----------------------------------------------------------------------------------Peer-feedback worksheets should ask the feedbacker to begin by offering
a positive comment about the paper. After that point, the peer feedbacker’s role
in commenting should be descriptive; each feedbacker should describe his
response to the paper. Examples of specific tasks include:
- Indicate which parts of the paper the reader finds most or least effective, and
why
- Identify the thesis
- List the major points of support or evidence
- Indicate sentences or paragraphs that seem out of order, incompletely
explained, or otherwise in need of revision
2.3.1.3. Creating an assessment system in peer- feedback
I have thought carefully about the kind of comments that I would provide
students when I feedbacked drafts and graded papers and deciding how I would

grade students’ contributions to peer-feedback sessions.
I assigned a point-value to different aspects of the work required for peer
feedback. The following example illustrates a point-system approach to grading
student performance in peer feedback:
Brought 2 copies of paper to class: 5 pts
Provided peers with specific, constructive written feedback: 0-5 pts
Participated actively in discussion of each paper: 0-5 pts
Wrote specific response to peers’ feedback: 0-5 pts
Total score for each peer-feedback session: 0-20 pts.
2. 3.2. Before the Peer-Feedback Session
2.3.2.1. Demonstrating a “mock” peer-feedback session.
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First, I copied and distributed a brief sample paper submitted by a student
in an earlier semester .The chosen paper is typical of students in grade 10. Next,
ask students to take 2minutes to read the paper and 5 minutes to write some
comments, using a peer-feedback worksheet. If time allows, you can ask
students to work in groups of 3-4 to produce written comments; if you do so,
give them an additional 4-6 minutes for group discussion.
After students have produced written comments individually or as a
group, use a document camera or overhead projector to show some feedbacking
comments to the class. When necessary, follow-up with questions that help the
students phrase their comments in more specific and constructive ways. For
example, if a student comments, “I like the first paragraph,” you might ask, “can
you tell the writer what you find effective or appealing about that paragraph?
And why?” Your aim should be to help students understand that the point of
their comments should be to describe their experience as readers with specific
language, not to praise or condemn their peers or to tell the peer how they would
write the paper.

2.3.2.2. Guiding students how to produce and respond to comments in peer
feedback
As your students need to learn and practice the skills involved in
providing constructive feedback on their peers’ writing, they will also need to
learn how to respond, as writers, to the feedback they receive. Therefore, you
might consider including in the “mock” peer-feedback session, described above,
an exercise in which you ask your students to put themselves in the position of
the writer and come up with a plan for revision based on the comments that they
and their classmates have formulated in response to the sample paper.
Students must learn how to approach a peer-feedback session with an
open mind. Often, undergraduate students go into a peer-feedback session
thinking that their papers are essentially “done” and need to be edited or
changed only slightly. They “hear” only those responses that confirm this view
and they end up making very few changes to their papers after the peer-feedback
session and before submitting the final draft to the instructor. It is useful to
institute a rule that prohibits writers from speaking when peer-feedbackers are
offering feedback.
An exception might be made in a case in which the writer does not
understand a feedbacker’s comments and needs to ask for more information. In
addition, instructors should require each writer to respond in writing to their
peers’ comments
2.3.2.3. Assigning permanent groups of peer-feedback
Peer feedback should be carried out in groups of three, If so, each student
will be feedbacking the papers of two peers during each peer-feedback session,
but each group will discuss three papers. It is best to assign students to groups,
rather than to have them define the groups themselves. Students often want to
form groups with friends, which may actually create difficulties. As you may
want to explain to your students, it can be more difficult to provide honest
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feedback to a writer when that writer is a friend. Moreover, assigning students to
the groups will allow the instructor to ensure that the groups are heterogeneous
in terms of, for example, student ability, gender, race, and academic major. Such
heterogeneity can enhance student learning in groups. When the time is limited,
the teacher should ask students to work in pairs.
Maintaining the pairs or groups throughout the semester will help your
students build the trust that is necessary for peer feedback to be successful. You
should encourage your students to speak with you if they find that their peerfeedback groups are not functioning as well as desired, but you should also
make it clear that you are interested in helping them find ways to work together
to solve whatever problems have surfaced.
2.3.3. During Peer-Feedback Sessions
2.3.3.1. Structuring each peer-feedback session with clear instructions and
time limits.
To start each session, distribute peer-feedback worksheets (see above),
explain how students should complete the worksheets, set time limits, and ask
each group to designate one person as a time-keeper to make sure that the group
stays on schedule. Peer-feedback sessions can be accomplished in 10-15
minutes. If instructors find that more time is preferable, consider asking students
to read their peers’ papers before coming to class (This is for giving peer
feedback on homework).
The following is a peer-feedback schedule that can work in a 45minute class. When writing papers in Tieng Anh 10 are around 100- 200 words
long, peer-feedbackers should spend about 10-15 minutes reading and
feedbacking each paper: 5 minutes reading the paper (tell students to read each
paper twice) and 5-10 minutes writing comments.
After all 3 students (or 2 students) have finished commenting on the
papers submitted by their peers, the group (the pairs) should then devote 2
minutes to a “discussion” of each paper. During this discussion, the 2
feedbackers should present spoken feedback to the writer. If feedbackers feel
uncomfortable with providing spoken feedback, they might start by reading their

written comments out loud to the writer. Doing so can produce the added benefit
of helping the feedbackers clarify their written comments. As noted above, the
writer of the paper should not speak during this discussion, except perhaps to
ask a clarifying question.
2.3.3.2. Being a supervisor and a guide
Even with clear instructions, peer-feedback sessions can go awry.
Circulate throughout the session to make sure that the groups stay focused.
Listen carefully to the spoken feedback, and use questions to help students make
their comments as specific and descriptive as possible. For example, if you hear
a student saying, “I was confused by the third paragraph,” you might prompt
them to say more by asking, “Can you tell the writer where you got lost?” or
“What word or phrase confused you? Why?” Students will soon learn to supply
such details themselves. Paying attention to how the groups are functioning
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overall can help you determine whether you need to give additional guidance to
the class as a whole.
2.3.4. After Peer-Feedback Sessions
2.3.4.1. Assessing the completed peer-feedback worksheets
Whether or not you are grading the responses that feedbackers and writers
write on the peer-feedback worksheets, you should read the completed
worksheets to get a sense of what students are actually doing during the peerfeedback sessions and how they are responding to one another’s comments.
Having the students turn in the worksheets also helps you communicate to them
that you are taking the peer-feedback process seriously. Instructors should also
give students feedback on their performance during peer feedback so that they
know what they are doing well and what they should try to improve upon.
2.3.4.2. Seeking and incorporating student input.
I feedbacked completed peer-feedback worksheets when I graded papers
not only to evaluate individual student performance, but also to gauge the

success of the peer-feedback sessions and to determine what you might do to
improve them.
- Are students writing thoughtful comments that provide an adequate
amount of detail? If not, spend some time in class before the next peer-feedback
session giving students suggestions for how to phrase comments in a specific,
constructive way.
- Are students using the peer-feedback worksheets to develop thoughtful
responses to peer comments?
- Are they coming up with plans for revision that take into account at least
some of their peers’ comments?
Around midterm, I asked students to complete anonymous evaluation
forms that include questions such as, “What is the most important insight that I
have learned as a result of the peer-feedback process?” and “What can be done
(by the instructor or by students, or both) to make the peer-feedback sessions run
more smoothly?”Be prepared to hear that the peer-feedback sessions are not
functioning as well as you believe they are, and be open to making changes that
incorporate your students’ observations and ideas. In other words, model the
same open-mindedness to revision that you want them to display as writers
during peer feedback.
In conclusion, the procedures of my applying peer feedback can briefly be
listed as following:
Step 1: Introduce the technique “peer feedback” to students and
emphasize the need to use it in writing process.
Step 2: Demonstrate examples of student writing and appropriate and
inappropriate peer feedback responses. Have students engage in providing peer
feedback with it.
Step 3: Provide students a handout that contains peer feedback guidelines
and a set of useful phrases for responding appropriately to classmates’ texts.(see
appendix 3)
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Step 4: In each lesson, assign students a writing task, ask them to
complete the first draft (10minutes) and then exchange their papers in pairs or
groups of three to perform peer feedback (6 minutes)
Step 5: Have students rewrite their paper after receiving peer feedback
Step 6: Assess the completed peer-feedback worksheets from students
Step 7: Collect and compare the first draft and completed paper after
responding to peer feedback to see any improvement in students’ products.
2.4. Application of peer feedback in writing lessons in grade 10 at Thieu
Hoa high school
2.4.1. Procedures of applying peer feedback in a writing lesson.
My writing lesson has these activities.
I. Warm- up. (3 minutes)
- Checking the attendance.
- A game to get students involved in new lesson.
II. Pre-writing (5 minutes)
It is important to ask students to prepare for the new lesson at home as
homework (by completing handouts designed by the teacher / ask students to
hand in the handouts for teacher to mark)
1. Giving feedback for handouts prepared at home.
- Teacher shows the keys or a model (on a poster or on a screen).
- Confirming the structure. (usually elicit the structure or format from the
students)
II. While- writing - 30 minutes
- Controlled writing (8 minutes)
(The teacher feedbacks on the board - students exchange their papers comment)
- Free writing. (22 minutes)
* First draft: 10 minutes
* Peer feedback: 6 minutes (Students base on the peer feedback sheet given to

comment their partner’s writing)
- Rewriting: 6 minutes
III. Post writing: Teacher feedback. (showing 2 examples) – 5 minutes.
IV. Homework: 2 minutes
2.4.2. Example of the application of peer feedback in English textbook 10
2.4.2.1. UNIT 1. A DAY IN THE LIFE OF………….
Writing a narrative
A.OBJECTIVES: By the end of the lesson, students will be able to:
1. Language skills:
- use key terms and key grammatical structures related to a hotel fire to write a
narrative about a hotel fire they know.
- use the past simple and past continuous tense to write a narrative
- develop writing and collaboration skills.
2. Educational purposes:
- Understand values of life after having frightening experience.
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- Be proud of themselves as they can work together to write an interesting
narrative.
B. PROCEDURES.
I. BEFORE WRITING
- Ask students to look up new vocabulary in the textbook, do Task 1 and Task 2,
Task 3 at home as homework. (They can do this well because they have books,
dictionaries and the internet)
- The teacher quickly gives feedback to what the students have done at home
and elicits the format of a story from the students.
II. WHILE WRITING
Controlled writing (8 minutes – They can do this task quickly because they have
prepared at home)

Use the prompts below to build up a narrative about a hotel fire.
2. Free writing.( 22 minutes )
Write about a hotel fire you know.
Steps:
Students work individually to write the first draft (10 minutes)
Peer feedback (6 minutes)
Students work individually to write their stories after receiving feedback from
their partner (6 minutes)
Peer feedback sheet.
Writer: ……………………………………………………
Reader: ……………………………………………………
1. Is the thesis stated?
2. Does the story have a strong beginning?
3. Is time order used to organize the story’s events and is the past simple and the
past continuous tense used correctly?
4. Do transition words help move the story along?
5. Is every sentence important to the story?
6. Is the writing free of misspellings?
7. Are words capitalized correctly?
8. Are sentences punctuated correctly?
9. Is the piece free of fragments and run-ons?
10. Is the paper neat, legible, and presented in an appropriate format
(introduction, body and conclusion)?
III. POST WRITING (5 minutes)
- The teacher gives feedback to 2 or 3 stories as examples
HOMEWORK (2 minutes)
2.4.2.2 UNIT 3: WRITING ABOUT PEOPLE’S BACKGROUND.
A.OBJECTIVES: By the end of the lesson, students will be able to write about
people’s background
B. PROCEDURES.

I. BEFORE WRITING:
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Ask students to look up new vocabulary in the textbook, do Task 1 and Task 2 at
home as homework. (They can do this well because they have books ,
dictionaries and the internet )
The teacher quickly gives a model of Newton’s Background and elicits the
format of a background from the students.
II. WHILE WRITING
1. Controlled writing (8 minutes – They can do this task quickly because they
have prepared at home)
- Task 1. Read Mr. Brown’s CV and write a paragraph about his background ,
using the cues given.
- The teacher gives feedback, students exchange their papers to comment
2. Free writing. Write about your partner’s parents.
Steps:
Students work individually to write the first draft (10 minutes)
Peer feedback (6 minutes)
Students work individually to write their paragraph after receiving feedback
from their partner (6 minutes)
Peer feedback sheet
Writer: ……………………………………………………
Reader:……………………………………………………
Does the paper present key facts and events in his / her life such as date of birth,
place of birth, school attended, exam passed and interests?
Is the past simple tense used for past events?
Is the present simple tense used for present facts?
Does the writer use correct form to write about above facts and events?
Does the paper provide insight into the person’s character?

Does the writer supply strong description of events?
Does the writer paint a vivid portrait using anecdote and quotes?
Does the writer make any errors in capitalization and punctuation?
Is the background presented in a logical and organized way?
III. POST WRITING (5 minutes)
- The teacher gives feedback to 2 or 3 stories as examples
HOMEWORK (2 minutes)
2.4.2.3
UNIT 4 . WRITING A LETTER OF COMPLAINT.

-

A.OBJECTIVES: By the end of the lesson, students will be able to write a letter of
complaint to an English Centre.
B. PROCEDURES.
BEFORE WRITING :
Ask students to look up new vocabulary in the textbook , do Task 1 and Task 2 at
home as homework . (They can do this well because they have books , dictionaries
and the internet )
The teacher quickly givesa model of a letter of complaint and elicit the format from
students.

WHILE WRITING
1.Controlled writing (8 minutes):

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-

1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.

The teacher introduces the situation in task 1 and ask students to do task 2.
(They can do this task quickly because they have prepared at home )
- The teacher gives feedback , students exchange their papers to comment
2.Free writing .
Imagine you saw an English centre’s advertisement in the newspaper. You decided
to study there . After 5 days studying there , you realised that some things are worse
than what the advertisement says. Write a letter of complaint
Steps:
Students work individually to write the first draft ( 10 minutes )
Peer feedback ( 6 minutes )
Students work individually to write their paragraph after receiving feedback from
their partner ( 6 minutes)
Peer feedback sheet
Writer: ……………………………………………………
Reader:……………………………………………………
Do the opening and closing have any errors in capitalization and punctuation ? If so ,
how can they be improved ?
Is it easy to see what the letter is about ?
Are ideas expressed in a clear and organized fashion ?
Are all sentences complete and well-constructed (no fragments, no run-ons) ?

Does the letter contain all the facts about the topic in Task 1 ?
Does the writer make any errors in grammar or spelling ?
Does the writer makes any errors in capitalization and punctuation ?
Does the letter comply with all the requirements for a formal letter ?
Are there any transition words ? If there are , are they used correctly ?
POST WRITING
- The teacher gives feedback to 2 or 3 letters as examples ( 5 minutes )
HOMEWORK ( 2 minutes )

2.4.2.4
UNIT 9. DESCRIBING INFORMATION FROM THE TABLE.
A.OBJECTIVES: By the end of the lesson, students will be able to describe
information from a table.
B. PROCEDURES.
I. BEFORE WRITING:
Before this lesson, the teacher asked students to look up new vocabulary in the
textbook , do Task 1 and Task 2 at home as homework. (They can do this well
because they have books, dictionaries and the internet)
From the model in Task 1, elicit the format from students.
II. WHILE WRITING
1. Controlled writing (8 minutes):
- Ask students to do task 2.
(They can do this task quickly because they have prepared at home )
- The teacher gives feedback, students exchange their papers to comment
2. Free writing.
The teacher gives some tables of information of some animals and asks
students to write about one of them
Steps:
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Students work individually to write the first draft (10 minutes)
Peer feedback (6 minutes)
Students work individually to write their paragraph after receiving feedback
from their partner (6 minutes)
Peer feedback sheet
Writer: ……………………………………………………
Reader: ……………………………………………………
Is the present simple tense correctly used for present facts?
Does the writer make any errors in capitalization and punctuation?
Is the writing free of misspellings?
Is the writing free of fragments and run-ons?
Does the description present a clear and complete picture with all the facts and
information from the table?
Are the details sufficient and appropriate?
Are the details presented in a recognizable and appropriate order?
Are transition words used effectively?
Is the paper neat, legible, and presented in an appropriate format?
Does the writing cover all the information in the table?
POST WRITING (5 minutes)
- The teacher gives feedback to 2 or 3 letters as examples
HOMEWORK (2 minutes)
2.4.2.5
UNIT 12
WRITING ABOUT A FAMOUS MUSICIAN

-

A.OBJECTIVES: By the end of the lesson, students will be able to write about a
famous musician’s life and career.

B. PROCEDURES.
.BEFORE WRITING :
Before this lesson , the teacher asked students to look up new vocabulary in the
textbook , do Task 1 and Task 2 at home as homework . (They can do this well
because they have books , dictionaries and the internet )
From the model in Task 1 , elicit the format from students.

WHILE WRITING

-

1.Controlled writing (8 minutes):
- Ask students to do task 2.
(They can do this task quickly because they have prepared at home )
- The teacher gives feedback , students exchange their papers to comment
2.Free writing . Write about a famous musician you admire
Steps:
Students work individually to write the first draft ( 10 minutes )
Peer feedback ( 6 minutes )
Students work individually to write their paragraph after receiving feedback from
their partner ( 6 minutes)
Peer feedback sheet
Writer: ……………………………………………………
Reader:……………… ……………………………………
No
Questions
1
Does the paper present key facts and events in his / her life such as

15

2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9

date of birth ,place of birth,school attended , exam passed and
interests ?
Is the past simple tense used for past events ?
Is the present simple tense used for present facts ?
Does the writer use correct form to write about above facts and
events ?
Does the writer supply strong description of events ?
Does the writer makes any errors in capitalization and
punctuation ?
Is the background presented in a logical and organized way ?
Does the paper provide insight into the person’s character?
Does the writer paint a vivid portrait using anecdote and quotes ?
POST WRITING ( 5 minutes )
- The teacher gives feedback to 2 or 3 letters as examples
HOMEWORK ( 2 minutes )

3. The result of the study
In writing lessons for the last school year, I have collected all the students’
first drafts (the ones they wrote before receiving peer feedback) and all the

students’ final works (the ones they wrote after receiving peer feedback). I
compared the first ones with the second ones (appendix2). As a result, there was
significant improvement in the second compositions compared with their first
drafts. The students’ writing skill has been improved after involvement in the
peer feedback learning method. This result found that peer feedback benefited
the students a great deal. Moreover, peer feedback helps make students more
active and involved in the lesson.
I have also compared the results of writing tasks at the beginning of the
school year with the results of writing tasks at the end of the school year.
Class students
Marks
Before
After
Improvement
10 B
40
8.0 – 10.0 5 – (12,5 % )
8- (20%)
3 (7,5%)
6.5 - 7.0
5 – (12,5 %)
10-(25%)
5 (12,5%)
5.0 – 6.0
10- (25% )
12-(30%)
2 (5%)
<5.0
20 –(50 %0
10 -(25%)

3 (25,5%)
The results of written essays proved that after involvement in peer feedback
learning, It definitely boost the quality of writing regarding to mark below 5
and from 6.5 to 7. The English learners had become able to write better in terms
of grammar accuracies, complex structures, a wide range of vocabularies and
punctuation that items peer feedback concentrate on. It was, therefore,
concluded that peer feedback learning had helped 10th graders to improve and
develop their writing skills.
From the procedures of applying peer feedback in teaching process, I
clearly see the benefits that students can gain as following:
Firstly, students consider it as an opportunity to learn from peers on
grammar, syntax, vocabulary and learning strategy, and to apply the learned
knowledge into practice.
16


Secondly, errors made by peers are warnings against the same repetitions
in their own essays.
Then, by changing the role from a writer to a reader and a reviewer,
personal ideas on a topic can be better communicated, views broadened, writers’
sense of audience enhanced and understanding of the theme deepened, a good
way to develop critical thinking. Finally, during the process, their reading,
writing and communicating skills are advanced.
III. CONCLUSION
1. Conclusion
Writing occupies an important place in learn and teaching English.
Students are required to do a great deal of writing. But, unless they are given
reliable feedback on their writing, the set writing tasks may not help them much
in improving their writing skills. Peer feedback in my class proves has positive
effects on students in writing process in several ways. It improves students self

confidence, it makes students accountable for their own learning, it minimizes
grading workload on teachers’ shoulders, it helps students know about their
writing weaknesses, and it builds a community of learners in writing classes
Moreover, peer feedback has been proven to build good relations amongst
students. Some students showed that students learnt best from their peers and
experienced love and the sense of sharing when working together.
There are some possible ways teachers can ensure that peer feedback is
implemented successfully in writing classes. Some of the suggested ways
include the use of checklists or guidelines designed by teachers. However,
students would need to be guided in how to use the guidelines. A teacher would
also need to show students what to look for in their peers’ written papers. A
careful preparation, dedication and patience should be needed to assure the
success of the technique application.
2. Proposal
2.1. To teachers:
- Be proficient in applying peer feedback in class context
- Well- prepared plan for using feedback in a writing lesson.
- Train students the use of feedback and encourage them in using it their learning
writing skill.
2.2. To students:
- Appreciate the benefits of peer feedback as learning opportunities, warnings
against repeated errors and means of multi-role interactions and skill
improvement
- Learn to use peer feedback effectively in writing lessons
- Be in respect manner in giving and receiving peer feedback
Because of time limitation, I do not avoid errors. I would like to receive
feedback from my colleagues, especially teachers who teach English to make
my initiatives more complete and widely applied in the teaching process.

17

.
I hereby acknowledge that this study is mine. The date and findings discussed in
the study are true, and not a copy of other’s

The confirmation of the Head –
Master

Thanh Hoa, 25th May 2019
The author

Lê Đăng Điển

Trịnh Thị Loan

REFERENCE
1. English textbook 10, Education and Pulishing House

18


2. Brookes and Grundy (2009: 11. Cited in Ghothbene, N. 2010) The Effect of
Teachers’ Written Feedback on Developing the Students’ Written Products Case
Study: Second Year EFL Students at Mohamed Kheider University of Biskra
3. Gielen et al., 2010a: Gielen, S., Peeters, E., Dochy, F., Onghena, P., & Struyven,
K. (2010). Improving the effectiveness of peer feedback for learning
4. Walker (2009). Peer Feedback in Learning English Writing: Advantages and
Disadvantages.Journal of Studies in Education ISSN 2162-6952 2013, Vol. 3,
No. 4

APPENDIX 1.
19


COMPARING THE FIRST DRAFTS AND THE COMPOSITION
(after receiving peer feedback )
Students

1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
14
15
16
17
18
19
20
21

22
23
24
25
26
27
28
29
30
31
32
33
34
35
36
37
38
39
40

Writing lesson 1
First
Composition
draft
(after receiving peer
feedback )
4.5
6.0
2.5
4.0

2.5
4.5
3.0
4.5
6.0
7.5
7.0
8.0
2.5
4.0
4.5
5.0
4.0
4.5
3.0
4.0
7.5
8.5
5.5
6.0
5.0
5.5
4.0
5.0
6.0
6.5
2.5
4.0
3.0
4.0

5.0
6.0
5.0
5.5
3.5
4.0
3.0
4.0
3.0
3.5
6.0
7.0
7.0
7.5
2.0
2.5
4.0
5.0
4.0
4.5
3.0
4.5
4.0
5.0
4.0
5.0
3.5
5.0
7.5
8.0

5.0
6.0
3.0
3.5
6.0
7.0
3.5
4.0
4.5
6.0
5.0
5.5
4.5
55
4.0
55

Writing lesson 2
First
Composition
draft
(after receiving peer
feedback)
4.0
4.5
35
5.0
5.0
5.5
5.0

6.0
7.0
7.5
6.5
7.5
6.0
6.5
4.5
5.5
6.5
7.0
3.5
5.0
7.5
8.0
5..0
7.0
4.5
5.5
4.0
4.5
6.5
7.5
6.0
6.5
4.5
5.5
45
6.0
4.0

5.0
4.5
5.0
2.5
4.0
3.5
4.0
7.0
7.5
6.0
6.5
3.5
4.0
4.5
5.0
4.5
6.0
4.5
6.0
4.5
5.0
4.0
4.5
4.0
5.0
6.5
7.0
5.5
6.0
3.5

4.0
6.5
7.0
7.0
7.5
4.0
4.5
5.5
6.5
5.0
5.5
5.0
5.5

Writing lesson 6
First
Composition
draft
(after receiving peer
feedback)
4.5
6.0
5.5
65
5.5
6.5
4.0
5.0
6.0
6.5

7.0
8.0
5.5
6.0
4.5
60
7.0
7.5
4.5
5.0
5.5
6.0
7.0
7.5
6.0
6.5
4.5
5.0
7.0
7.5
6.5
7.0
2.0
3.0
6.0
6.5
7.0
8.0
6.0
6.5

4.5
5.0
2.0
4.0
6.0
7.0
6.0
6.5
40
4.5
5.0
6.0
4.5
5.0
5.0
6.0
5.0
6.0
45
6.0
4.5
6.0
5.5
6.0
5.0
6.0
5.5
6.0
6.0
7.0

5.5
6.5
4.5
5.0
5.5
6.0
6.0
65
6.0
65

APPENDIX 2.
COMPARING THE RESULTS AT THE BEGINNING OF THE SCHOOL YEAR
AND THOSE AT THE END OF THE SCHOOL YEAR.

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Class students
10 B
40

Marks
8.0 – 10.0
6.5 - 7.0
5.0 – 6.0
<5.0

Before
5 – (12,5 % )

5 – (12,5 %)
10- (25% )
20 –(50 %0

After
8- (20%)
10-(25%)
12-(30%)
10 -(25%)

Improvement
3 (7,5%)
5 (12,5%)
2 (5%)
3 (25,5%)

APPENDIX 3.

Liu and Hansen List of Useful Sentences for Peer Review Activities
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What ESL students might say

This wrong



How could you say that?

What might be more appropriate

Is this right

I’m not sure if this is right

I wonder if this is what you had in mind

I’m afraid I don’t understand what you meant

Could you explain to us what you wanted to say here?

I did not quite understand your point here.

Would you please rephrase this sentence?






Please change this word/
expression/ sentence because it
makes no sense here.









I don’t understand this paper








I don’t like this paper









How could you write this paper
without thesis statement?







Why did you use this word/
expression/ sentence again and
again?









What do you mean here
This idea is interesting, but I could not find any
discussion in your paper to support this idea.
Your point is well made, but there is
lack of evidence to convince me.
I thought this word meant…
I don’t understand this word.
Could you please clarify this word/
expression/sentence?
I might be wrong, but I did not catch what you meant
here.
Can you come up with a better
word/ expression/ sentence for
what you had in mind
What do you mean?
What is your main idea?
I’m afraid that I did not quite

understand this paper because…
It seems that you have spent a lot
of time working on this paper, but
could you give us a brief summary of it?
I’m a little confused about the
paper.
I’m not sure I agree with ideas
You put a lot of effort into this
paper, but I feel like I could have
enjoyed it more if I knew what
you intended to say.
Although some points are well
made, I guess your way of
thinking is different from mine.
Can you tell me where your thesis
statement is?
Your thesis statement is not clear to me.
Could you help me locate your
thesis statement in the paper?
Can you use another word here?
You use this word a lot. Maybe
use a different word.
This word/ expression/ sentence is
good here, but its power is
decreased due to overuse.
I like this word/ expression/
sentence, but your paper might be
better with a variety of expressions.
Could you think of another word/
expression/ sentence to enrich the text?

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

You could have done a better job









This paper is perfect







This is good but you need to…
I like your paper, but you can…
I can see your effort here, but I am
sure you can find many ways to
improve your paper such as…
I can see you have a lot to do in

your revision of this paper,
although the basic idea of this paper is there.
Very good. You could…
This is good but if you want you can…
Well done. But this paper could be better if you…
What a good job! If I were you, I would still work
hard to improve…
Nice job. I believe you can still work on…

(From: Liu & Hansen, 2002, pp. 141-142)

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