IT training midweek sport TruePDF 13 march 2019

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MIDWEEK

March 13, 2019
£1
(on sale Wed Mar 13 & Thur Mar 14)

Why did
Love
Island
Olivia
show
off her
boobs?

GREALISH
THUG
HAS
PRICE
ON HIS
HEAD IN
PRISON
SEE PAGE 5

FIND OUT
- PAGE 12

STUNNA HAD
SEX IN STREET
OUTSIDE

MOSQUE
ORY

LL ST
Morning prayers FU- PA
GE 11
worshippers found randy pair

Rhian
busts
out!
SEE INSIDE


2

MIDWEEK

THE IRA ARE
BACK!

March 13, 2019

Hawking’s
nurse gets
struck off

THE former nurse of
Professor Stephen
Hawking has been

struck off the nursing
register after a panel
found she did not give
appropriate care to the
renowned physicist.
The Nursing and
Midwifery Council said
yesterday that Patricia
Dowdy “failed to provide
the standards of good,
professional care that
we expect and Professor
Hawking deserved”.
The 61-year-old, who
was with Prof Hawking
(above) between 1999
and 2004 and employed
again from July 2013,
had been handed an
interim suspension
back in March 2016.
She faced multiple
misconduct charges in
relation to the care she
provided to the boffin,
who died in March last
year at the age of 76.
The family of Prof
Hawking lodged a
complaint which had

initially prompted the
investigation into
Mrs Dowdy.

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Horror as terror group claims
to be responsible for bombs

RETURN: The old face of terror
(above) and bomb disposal
unit in Glasgow last week

Ben Nevis:
Two dead

TWO climbers have died
and two injured in an
avalanche on Ben Nevis,
police last night said.
Inverness Coastguard
helicopter, an air ambulance,
three road ambulances
and a trauma team were
sent to the scene.
Lochaber Mountain
Rescue Team was
supported by members of
Glencoe Mountain Rescue
Team in the rescue effort.

The alarm was raised
to the incident in Number
5 Gully at 11.50am.
Yesterday, the Scottish
Avalanche Information
Service assessed the
potential avalanche risk
in Lochaber, where Ben
Nevis is located, as “high”.

The Met and Police Scotland said
similar packages were sent in the
past by dissident Northern Ireland
groups.

Police also revealed that one package
may be unaccounted for.
The devices arrived on March 5 and 6
at Waterloo Station, buildings near
Heathrow Airport, London City Airport
and the University of Glasgow.
A joint statement from Police Scotland
and the Metropolitan Police yesterday
said the claim of “IRA” responsibility was
received on Monday by the Belfast-based
Irish News, and that a recognised
codeword was used.
It added: “Given the packages received
last week bore similarities to devices

By COLIN HURST
sent in the past which were linked to
dissident groups associated with Northern
Ireland-related terrorism, officers were
already looking at this as a line of inquiry.
“However, we continue to keep an open
mind and enquiries continue.
“We are also aware that those claiming
responsibility have indicated five devices
were sent. At this time, only four have
been recovered.

Vigilant

“Extensive advice has already been
issued to relevant businesses and sectors
to be vigilant for and report suspicious
packages to police.
“This advice was previously sent to
armed forces personnel and is being
reiterated again in light of this claim.
“We continue to urge the public to
remain vigilant and report anything
suspicious to police.”

A BRITISH woman
who went missing in
Guatemala died in “a
tragic accident”, a
charity has said.

Catherine Shaw, 23
(above), from Witney,
Oxon, was reported
missing after she left a
hotel near Lake Atitlan
on March 5.
Her body was found
by a search team about
60ft from the top of the
Indian Nose hiking
trail on Monday.
The Lucie Blackman
Trust, which has been
helping Ms Shaw’s
family, said “foul play was
probably not involved”.
Trust chief executive
Matthew Searle said
speculation that she was
raped and murdered was
“incredibly unhelpful,
distressing and
unnecessary”.
He said Ms Shaw
had been fasting and
she may have passed
out or fallen “due to
her lack of intake of
food and fluid”.
He added: “She was

very much a nature
lover and adored
sunrises, so it seems
quite conceivable that
she went up the
mountain to greet the
sunrise, shedding
clothing as she went.”

UK Boeing 737
are grounded

DESTROYED:
Manchester

OFFICERS investigating devices
sent to addresses in London and
Glasgow have confirmed a claim
of responsibility has been made
in the name of the “IRA”.

British hiker’s
tragic accident
on mountain

The parcel bomb incidents come almost
a year after MI5 downgraded the threat
posed in Britain by Irish Republicans.
It is currently classified as “moderate”,
meaning attacks are possible, but not

likely.
In Northern Ireland, the risk is greater,
exemplified by a car bomb detonating
in Londonderry in January.
All the attacks were claimed by an
organisation calling itself the IRA.
It’s often referred to as “the new IRA”, to
distinguish it from the Provisional IRA.
The Provos were active in Northern
Ireland and on the mainland – detonating,
for example, a huge bomb in Manchester
city centre in 1996 – during the Troubles.

THE UK’s Civil Aviation
Authority has banned the
Boeing 737 MAX from
operating in or over
UK airspace “as a
precautionary measure”.
The decision comes
after an Ethiopian Airlines
plane crashed on
Sunday, killing 157
people on board.
It was the second fatal
accident involving the
737 Max 8 model in less
than five months.
Countries including
China, France and

Germany have also
grounded the jets.
But US officials say the
aircraft are still safe to fly.
The CAA said the
directive would remain in
place until further notice.

YANKS ‘WOULD LOSE WW3’
IT will be cold and very
windy with sunshine and
showers, heavy in
places, with snow
over
northern
hills.
Showers
will steadily ease
but rain will reach
the west later.
Temperatures
of 10C in London,
8C in Cardiff, 9C in
Manchester, 8C in
Belfast
and
8C
in
Edinburgh.
Thursday is unsettled,

FRI:
Mixed
bag

SAT:
Cloud
and rain

SUN:
Some
sun

with bouts of wind and
rain, heavy in the west.
Temperatures of 13C
in London, 12C in Cardiff,
11C in Manchester, 10C
in Belfast and 10C in
Edinburgh.
OUTLOOK: Milder.

THE US will not stand a chance
against Russia and China should
World War III break out, advanced
warfare analysts have warned.
Nonprofit global policy think tank
RAND has been performing simulated
war scenarios – often sponsored by
the Pentagon – to test how American

forces would fare against the world’s
other leading military superpowers.
Last week, RAND analysts revealed
the US has suffered severe losses in
these scenarios, despite spending
ONE TRILLION dollars annually on
the military, twice exceeding the
spending of any other country.
“In our games, when we fight
Russia and China, ‘blue’ gets its
ass handed to it,’ researcher David

Ochmanek explained at the Center for
a New American Security.
US forces are usually colour-coded
blue in the simulations.
Though hypothetical, the games
warn the world order America has
fought to protect for more than a
century could be at risk.
The simulated conflicts take place

in all five domains of battle – land,
sea, air, space and cyberspace.
Accord to RAND, ‘red’ aggressor
forces frequently burn US military
bases to the ground, sink warships
and take out cyber systems.
Robert Work, a former deputy
secretary of defence and experienced

war-gamer, explained that America’s
F-35 fighter (left) jet is the most
advanced of its kind in the sky, but
is vulnerable on the tarmac.
He said: “It gets killed on the
ground in large numbers.”
Work and Ochmanek both said
China focus on cyberspace with
‘system destruction warfare’, which
targets American communications
satellites,
command-and-control
systems, and wireless networks.


BREW
DO
YOU
THINK
YOU
ARE?

GET THE SPORT ONLINE FREE FOR A MONTH! GO TO www.sundaysportonline.co.uk

Age 28, 34E-26-32, from
Hammersmith, west London

Sammie Pennington

ME

O
H
S
Y
A
ALW PLESS
OF TO S
BABE

March 13, 2019

MIDWEEK

3

GOOD
BOOZE:
TV bosses
have ale
contest
planned

Telly chiefs
to make
celebrity
micropub
reality show
By REX ROWLANDS

TELLY bosses are to
combine two of modern
life’s biggest obsessions
– reality TV and booze –
for what they reckon will
a ratings winner.

The new show will train
two teams of celebs how to
brew craft beer – and then
pit them against each other
flogging their ale in competing
pop-up boozers.

Comic

The new show, provisionally
called Celebrity BrewPub, is
hush-hush at the moment but
it’s believed producers want ale
fan James May to host it.
A source close to the
production crew said: “They’ve
drawn up a wish list of possible
contestants.
“They’d love Michelle Keegan
for her bar experience off
Coronation Street and Megan
Barton-Hanson for her big tits.
“And for a bit of a comic turn,

they’d like Arg from TOWIE.
He’d probably do something
funny like fall in the tun of beer
as it was brewing.
“All in all, it’s sure to be telly
gold, if it gets the go-ahead.”

ALE ABOARD: May,
Megan, Michelle
and TOWIE’s Arg

NICKI’S BIG COCK CALL
RAUNCHY Nicki Minaj delighted fans
at a London concert when she asked
if there were any “sexy boys with a big
penis” in the crowd.
The rapper (right), 36, was at the O2
Arena, for a bumper 36 song set-list.
Within minutes she was being
wheeled around on a four poster bed
before simulating masturbation to her
aptly titled song Feeling Myself.
She later put out the cock shout.
A fan said: “She’s hot.”


4

MIDWEEK

GET THE SPORT ONLINE FREE FOR A MONTH! GO TO www.sundaysportonline.co.uk

March 13, 2019

d
n
a
h
e
n
o
n
o
‘I can count
s
e
m
i
t
f
o
r
e
the numb
.
.
.
d
e
k

a
n
n
e
I’ve be

GAME OF THRONES EXCLUSIVE
Inbetweeners
James given a
‘horrible’ cock
THE Inbetweeners
Movie writer Damon
Beesley has revealed
the “most expensive”
effect in the film is
when James Buckley’s
alter ego Jay Cartwright
has his swimming
trunks pulled down –
because they needed to
use a STUNT COCK.
Buckley was given a
“horrible c**k” for the
film after he annoyed
Beesley by refusing to
strip for the scene.
A double had to be
found at the last
minute after James
(above), 31, refused to

expose his manhood.
Damon, 48, said he
took “vicious delight” in
superimposing the
double’s penis on
James as viewers
would assume he had
exposed his own bits.
In an interview he
said: “It was annoying
for us was because he’d
had the script for about
eight months.
“We found someone
in Majorca, where we
filmed. I said to James
we had a double.
“It’s a full-length
body shot of James but
someone with a much
more horrible cock
superimposed. Nobody
knows it’s not his. I
had a little vicious
delight in that.”

‘Er, how many
fingers do you
have, Emilia?’

1

2

3

4

5

6

Fact me!
IN Georgia,
no one may
carry an
ice cream cone
in their back
pocket if
it is Sunday

Wonga compo
claims rocket
OVER 40,000 Wonga
customers are seeking
compensation from the
defunct payday lender,
with administrators to the
firm expecting the number
to shoot up further.

Documents released by
the Treasury Committee
show that the number has
mushroomed from a
January estimate of
10,500 as more borrowers
sold unaffordable loans
come forward, chairwoman
Nicky Morgan was told.”
Wonga collapsed in
August after it was hit by
a surge in people making
compensation claims over
historical loans.
Mrs Morgan wrote to
corporate undertakers
Grant Thornton to ask
how the accountancy firm
intends to progress
outstanding complaints.
Its boss Dave Dunckley
responded saying that
they will set up a portal
for customers to make
claims directly online.

7

WITH just weeks to go until the start
of Game of Thrones season eight,

star Emilia Clarke has defended
the level of nudity in the “tits and
dragons” fantasy drama.

As fans eagerly await the final series
of the HBO classic, Emilia has denied
it’s just a big ol’ nude fest.
In the past the fantasy drama has sparked
headlines over violence and nudity.

Epic

And a scene involving Kit Harington’s
bare bum was billed by some an ‘epic’
moment in the show’s history.
But Emilia is defiant. She stormed: “Kit’s
ass, someone else’s ass, my ass, it doesn’t

By GRACE HOOPER



matter! It’s not what the show is about,
it’s not what any bit of acting is about.
“As for my character, I can count on one
hand the amount of times I’ve been naked.
“I can talk about the importance of women
in this show until the cows come home. It
has gone a way to changing the landscape
of the industry as we see it, which is really

vital and really important.”
Co-star Gwendoline Christie echoed
Emilia’s sentiments and said her character,
Brienne, ‘was defying gender norms and
the female perceptions that we have’ on TV
thus far.
In the interests of research, Midweek
Sport checked just how many times Emilia
HAS been naked in the series…


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BRUTE
FARCE:
Moron
Mitchell
faces a
beating
in prison

Kerry chooses
new fellas by
their ‘sex face’
KERRY Katona admits
she sizes a man up by
wondering what face
he’d pull if they were
having sex.
The mum-of-five let

slip the method on the
latest installment of
Celebs Go Dating.
When shown an
image of a potential
suitor by dating experts
Anna Williamson and
Paul Carrick Brunson,
Kerry squinted at the
photograph.
Explaining what she
was doing, the Atomic
Kitten star (above), 39,
said: “Sometimes I try
imagining what they
look like when they’re
having sex, what kind
of face would he pull?”
But Kerry decided to
meet the man for the
E4 show, saying: “It’s a
picture. A picture can
say 1000 words, but till
you meet somebody...”
On the date the man
– Giancarlo from
Romford, east London
– used phrases such as
“are you off to dump
your kids off at the

pool”, a euphemism for
taking a poo.
Kerry declined to see
him again but said:
“I’ve not had sex in a
long, long time... that’s
what I need to sort out!”

GREALISH
THUG
‘WILL
BE KEPT
IN NONCE
WING’
NEWS
EXCLUSIVE

NORWAY
knighted
a penguin

THE date for the final
episode of long-running
sitcom The Big Bang
Theory has been announced.
U.S. TV network CBS
said the last episode, an
hour-long special, will
arrive on May 16.
E4, which broadcasts

the programme in the UK,
will show it at a later date.
Jim Parsons, Kaley
Cuoco, Johnny Galecki,
Mayim Bialik, Melissa
Rauch, Simon Helberg,
and Kunal Nayyar star in
the show, which has been
one of the most popular
comedies on TV since it
launched in 2007.
The programme will end
after 12 seasons and 279
episodes, and will be the
longest-running multicamera series in
television history.

MIDWEEK

MIDWEEK

Fact me!

Last Big Bang
show date set

March 13, 2019

GREAL
SHAME:

But thug
will pay
price in
jail (right)

SOCCER thug Paul Mitchell will be forced
to live amongst paedophiles and rapists
during his prison term over fears he will
be attacked in jail.

The Birmingham City fan, 27, was jailed for
14 weeks after he ran onto the pitch at the
club’s St Andrews ground and punched rivals
Aston Villa’s ace midfielder Jack Grealish.
He will serve out his
sentence
in
HMP
Birmingham and prison
guards have decided to
keep him in the jail’s
nonce wing to protect
him from angry Aston
Villa fans who may be
out for revenge. A
source said: “Normally
when a prisoner is this
notorious, when they
have done something

Fears for yob’s safety in hell jail
By REX ROWLANDS


really horrible, they
need protection.
“This
prick
isn’t
exactly Ian Huntley but

if we put him in with
the
general
prison
population there is a
good chance he might
not even get to see the
week out.
“The safest place for
him is in the vulnerable

prisoners’ wing. He’s
not a nonce but he’ll
be
surrounded
by
them.
“There will be a price
on his head.”

It doesn’t help that
HMP Birmingham is

officially one of the
worst prisons in the
country, with violence
and poor hygiene.
Its last inspection
reported how it’s floors
were
littered
with
“cockroaches, blood and

‘Littered with cockroaches, blood and vomit’

vomit”.
Things were so bad
that the private prison
was taken off its
owners G4S and is
now being run by the
government.
Experts say things
have improved since
but it is still one of the
most dangerous prisons
in the UK.

5

GET THE SPORT ONLINE FREE FOR A MONTH! GO TO www.sundaysportonline.co.uk

March 13, 2019

Go solo James
on song after
label ‘blow’
JAMES Morrison says
it was a “blow” when
he was dropped by his
record label, but now
sees the setback as
“more positive than
negative”.
The singer, 34, shot
to fame with hits You
Give Me Something
and Broken Strings.
But after releasing
four studio albums
with Universal Music,
including 2015’s Higher
Than Here, he was
dropped from the label.
He is now releasing
new record You’re
Stronger Than You
Know on his own label,

Stanley Park Records.
James (above) told
BBC Breakfast: “It’s
more positive to me
than negative.
“At the start it was a
bit of a blow, but now
I’m doing it myself and
I feel a bit more
confident in the space
that I’m in.
“I feel I’m being
supported a little bit
more in the right way
as an artist, so that in
turn helped me be
more creative.”

DON’T MISS
THIS SUNDAY’S

MOTLEY
CRUE –
THE INSIDE
STORY OF
WORLD’S
WILDEST
ROCK BAND
Sky Bet ‘noggin’
ad deemed bad

A TELLY ad for Sky Bet
has been banned for
suggesting players who
know a lot about sport
were more likely to
gamble successfully.
The ad, seen in August,
was narrated by football
presenter Jeff Stelling,
who said: “Spark your
sports brain and roll all
the possibilities into one
bet ... How big is your
sports noggin?”
Advertising Standards
bosses said it could lead
to irresponsible gambling.”

Age 24, 34G-28-34, from Basildon, Essex

MIDWEEK

Emily Leigh

6

NAKED
TRAIN
PLOP
MAN

‘MAY
HAVE
HAD
STROKE’
SLURRED
SPEECH:
Hines

A HAIRDRESSER believes he may have
suffered a stroke before he took off his
clothes and took a dump on a busy
commuter train, a court heard.

Malcolm Hines, 58, was on the Greater
Anglia service after visiting his 104-year-old
mother when he allegedly began to undress in
front of passengers.

He was arrested and escorted from the train at
Stratford station shortly
before 6pm on February
By COLIN HURST
15.

Defending,
Martin
Lewis told Highbury
Corner
Magistrates’ have suffered a stroke.”
Hines, who was said

Court: “It is an unusual
case and there is no to be a wealthy man,
doubt he acted in this went to the Royal Free
Hospital the day after
way.
“He is on a train the incident and is
coming into London now seeking private
from Southend, there treatment to find the
are other people in the cause of his behaviour.
Mr Lewis told the
carriage.
“The defendant is court: “It may be that
something
happened to
then seen taking off
defendant
that
his
trousers
and the
caused
him
to act in this
defecating on the floor.
way. He is mortified.
Erratic
“He has no recollection
“British
Transport and all he can remember
Police

attended
at is having an argument
his
mother’s
Stratford and escorted with
carers.
him off the train.
“He
can
remember
“His behaviour was
erratic and he had to getting on the train and
then after he does not
be handcuffed.
anything
“The
police
had remember
concerns
about
his else.
Mr Lewis asked the
behaviour, as it is very
unusual, he was not court to adjourn the
taking any medication hearing so Hines could
or under the influence have an MRI scan to
see if he had suffered
of drugs.”
Mr Lewis said Hines any brain injury.
Hines, of Maida Vale,

believes he was seriously
west London, did not
ill at the time.
“Mr Hines was feeling enter a plea to one
of
outraging
very unwell, he had count
bloated hands, one side public decency.
He will next appear at
of his face was fallen and
Highbury Magistrates
his speech was slurred.
“He believes he may Court on April 29.

UBER LOSERS

JAPA-FREEZE

A CAT, a painting of
The Last Supper and
45 pieces of fried
chicken are among the
strangest items left
behind after journeys
with Uber in the UK.

A MIDDLE-aged man
spotted roaming the
streets naked bar a pair
of glasses in -3C

temperatures is being
hunted by cops in
Sapporo, Japan.


GET THE SPORT ONLINE FREE FOR A MONTH! GO TO www.sundaysportonline.co.uk

Fern: Sex is
great – but
so is a brew!
TELLY presenter Fern
Britton has revealed
the secret to her long
marriage to Phil
Vickery – sex is good
but so is a CUPPA!
Lifting the lid on
their bedroom life, the
former This Morning
host (above) told a
magazine: “Sex is
great, but a cup of tea
is great too.
“There’s nothing
nicer than getting into
bed with a cuppa and
having a hug and a
chat – that’s love.
“Lust is great, but
when you really love

someone and you trust
each other, and you’re
in bed together
drinking tea and
chatting, that’s a true
relationship.”
Fern, 61, met the
celebrity chef, 57, on
the set of Ready Steady
Cook in 1999 and they
married a year later.
Fern admits that the
couple, who have been
married 19 years, have
“humdinger” rows but
let each other have
freedom.
She said: “Yes, we
have humdingers, but
then we’re normal.
“Anyway, that’s good
for the children to see.”

IS THIS THE BEST
FOOTBALL TV
SERIES EVER ?

Fact me!
IN 1980, a
Las Vegas

hospital
suspended
workers for
betting on
when patients
would die

Woman who passed
out close to oral sex
orgasm ‘had stroke’
A WOMAN was taken to
hospital after suffering a
STROKE while receiving
ORAL SEX.
The 44-year-old, from
west London, passed out
as she was nearing
orgasm – and scans later
revealed a blood vessel
had burst inside her skull.
Despite only suffering a
“moderate” headache
when she came round,
she was rushed to A&E.
Medics didn’t directly
explain what caused the
stroke – but said changes
in blood pressure during
sex are “well-described”
as a cause of bursting

blood vessels.
The unnamed woman
was treated at West
Middlesex University
Hospital in Isleworth, in
the London borough of
Hounslow.
Her partner, whose sex
is unknown, noticed her
“body was stiff” while
performing oral sex on
her.

RUNNING a top-flight football club is never
going to be an easy job for anyone…
For a 19-year-old, it’s extraordinary.

TEAM BUILDER: Jack
has the full backing of
experienced dad David

But Jack Sullivan is no ordinary teenager.
Jack, the youngest son of West Ham owner and
Sport publisher David Sullivan, was appointed
managing director of West Ham United women’s
team by his father in 2017.
And Jack’s journey is the subject of a fascinating
BBC documentary series called Britain’s Youngest
Football Boss.
The programme reveals

By GRACE HOOPER
how Jack was given

the responsibility of
overseeing the 18-strong ride. Dad David is
women’s squad, which confident of his teenage
competes in the top son’s abilities to manage
flight Women’s Super the women’s team, but
League.
some of the players
What’s
more,
the themselves are unsure
teenager
was
also about his young age.
tasked with raising
A
team
member
the profile of women’s comments during the
football – a sport often show: “That is a bit
sneered at by male fans. young to be a director
of a club, but I believe
Mission
he has good vision for
Jack, who lives in the club to take the
his family’s £13million team to the top.”
Essex mansion, clearly
Britain’s

Youngest
has the same dogged Football Boss, screened
determination as his via the online-only BBC3
father, one of the richest channel, is already a
men in the UK.
winner, attracting huge
Jack tells the TV audiences.
cameras: “I did work
Impressed critics are
experience all around calling it “Engaging.
West Ham. I went This is one of the best
around ticketing, retail, football
documentary
warehouse – that was series ever.”
instead of doing my
But
the
warmest
A-Levels.
words come from Jack’s
“As soon as that year brother, David Junior.
finished I said ‘Dad I
He said: “I can’t speak
want to do something, I highly enough of him,
want a task, a mission’ to be honest. If he
and that was to run the does manage to do it,
ladies, which I love. I arguably it could be one
of the most impressive
jumped in head first.”
It’s not been an easy things in football.”

March 13, 2019

MIDWEEK

ON THE
BALL: Jack
will give
his all
to bring
success to
West Ham

’S
BRITAINEST
YOUNGL BOSS
L
FOOTBAABLE ON
IL
A
AV
BBC
BBC3 &YER
iPLA

7


8

MIDWEEK

GET THE SPORT ONLINE FREE FOR A MONTH! GO TO www.sundaysportonline.co.uk

March 13, 2019

HAIR
WE
GO
AGAIN!
NAKED
PROTEST:
Stripping
doc’s
latest
warning

LINDSAY
PELAS

DEMI
ROSE
MAWBY

AUDREY
O’DAY

Brexiteers
minge-shame
pro-EU boffin

By GRACE HOOPER


ANTI-Brexit boffin Dr
Victoria Bateman took to
Twitter again on Monday
– in the buff, naturally –
to harangue MPs ahead
of last night’s crucial
vote on Britain leaving
the EU.

caption in
here please

Dr Bateman took to
cyberspace clad in her
trademark birthday suit –
to warn that Brexit will
leave Britain ‘Naked”.

But critics noticed that the
39-year-old Doc’s MINGE was
even hairier than usual.

Storm

And many took to the web to
suggest she got a minge-mow.
David Fincher commented:

“She’s clearly not one to beat
about the bush”, while Josamu
scolded: “Shave at least.”
Others, though, defended
the boffin’s badger-like snatch.
One raged: “Calling for
Victoria to shave her big bushy
fanny is nothing more than
misogynistic minge-shaming.”
The Cambridge University
economics don has caused a
storm recently by arguing in
favour of Britain staying in
the EU while stark naked.

SNOOP DOG’S BARKING GLAD
A DOG that went viral after
footage of it being abandoned
was watched around the
world has found a new home.
The story of Snoop the
Staffordshire bull terrier
began when the the animal
was dumped at the roadside
in Stoke-on-Trent on
December 17 last year.
CCTV footage of a man
getting out of a car with the
dog on a lead before the pet
was abandoned was watched

millions of times after it
was released by the RSPCA.

The video showed the male
dog then jumping up at the
car’s window as the vehicle
was driven off.
The animal’s plight went
viral and thousands of
potential owners – including
US-based rapper Snoop Dogg
– came forward offering to
re-home the dog.
However, Snoop (left) now
has a place to call home – in
the rolling Herefordshire
countryside with new owner
Laurence Squire – and is a
“regular” at the local pub.

JOJO
BARBIE
KENDRAND
SUTHERLA


GET THE SPORT ONLINE FREE FOR A MONTH! GO TO www.sundaysportonline.co.uk

MIDWEEK

9

PORN BEAST
HAD SECRET
GUN BUNKER

THE BUST
OF
THE DAY!

Cops find 2 MILLION
vile images at farm

DON’T you just love ’em! Celeb babes
■
just adore flashing their bits on social
media – and here’s a selection of the
hottest ones this week…

By COLIN HURST

COURTNEENY
STODD
ANGELA
WHITE

FERNE
McCANN

A MAN who amassed more than two

million indecent images and stored
weapons beneath his home has been
jailed for 12 years and eight months.

Geoffrey Crossland, 70, was being investigated
by child abuse officers who found guns and
ammunition in an underground bunker when
they raided his farmhouse in Harrogate, N Yorks.
He pleaded guilty to making indecent images
and 11 firearms charges.
JAILED: Gun nut Crossland
Judge Andrew Stubbs said the “scale of the
depravity” was hard to
understand.
At York Crown Court,
the judge added: “Your
criminality was unearthed,
almost literally, on October
18 last year, when officers
searched your house for
cards,
USB
sticks, They found an “arsenal
images of children.
“One issue which is DVDs, SIM cards, floppy of weapons” and about
not forgotten is that disks, laptops, tablets 24,000 rounds of ammo.
He was arrested at
mobile
phones
these images capture and

Heathrow Airport on
real life people, and at containing the images.
his
return.
“painstakingly
He
the same time, real life
Crossland
pleaded
sexual
abuse
being categorised” the pictures
guilty
to six charges of
and
some
dated
as
far
carried out on them.”
possessing
prohibited
The “scale of the back as 1988.
His
underground firearms, two charges
depravity”
that
the
images depicted was bunker was fitted with of possessing firearms
hard for the public to a shooting range and without the relevant

understand,
Judge had an area for making certificate, two charges
of possessing ammunition
ammunition.
Stubbs added.
Crossland’s wife had without the relevant
Extreme
answered the door when certificate, and one of
Crossland, of Padside officers arrived, while possessing a shotgun
Green Farm, previously he was on a shooting without the relevant
admitted three counts of holiday in Argentina. certificate.
making indecent images
between January 2011
and October 2018.
The images found at
his home – 34,612 of
which were in the most
extreme category A –
were described by the
Crown
Prosecution
Service as one of the
largest known collections
in England and Wales.
BUNKER: Officers
Officers executed a
raided his farmhouse
search warrant of his
home and found SD

Air pollution bigger
killer than smoking

EMMA
GLOVER

March 13, 2019

AIR pollution is a bigger
global KILLER than
smoking.
A new study suggests
that 8.8million deaths per
year around the world can
be attributed to dirty air –
chiefly fine sooty particles
pouring out of vehicle
exhausts, factories and
power plants.
Co-author Professor
Thomas Munzel, from the
University Medical Centre
Mainz in Germany, said:
“To put this into
perspective, this means
that air pollution causes
more extra deaths a year
than tobacco smoking,
which the World Health
Organisation estimates

was responsible for an
extra 7.2million deaths in
2015.
“Smoking is avoidable,
but air pollution is not.”
Air pollution was
thought to have caused
64,000 deaths in the UK
in 2015.

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10

MIDWEEK

March 13, 2019

GET THE SPORT ONLINE FREE FOR A MONTH! GO TO www.sundaysportonline.co.uk

georgie

DAR
DA
RBY
ORGEOUS Georgie Darby says she wants
G

to enjoy a bonkathon where she’s so
satisfied it HURTS.

The kinkster says she’s ready for a good
seeing-to EIGHT TIMES a day and wants hot,
porn-style, filthy sex every time.
Georgie, 26, from Guildford, Surrey, has
both nipples of her 32F boobies pierced.
More shockingly, she says a fella once
pleased her with his huge dick while she was
tied up.
She said: “If it was up to me, I would have
sex seven or eight times a day. I like the

feeling of being totally satisfied – to the point
where you’re almost sore!
“I love ANYTHING kinky. I love being tied
up to a bed and being seen to by a
dominating man.
“One time in particular, I was tied to a
chair with my hands behind my back and a
gag in my mouth.
“I sat and watched as this guy came over
and removed my gag – and put his huge cock
in my mouth.
“I loved it, it was so sexy, it was just like
being in a filthy porno.”


GET THE SPORT ONLINE FREE FOR A MONTH! GO TO www.sundaysportonline.co.uk

# H O T ’N’ H O R N Y

March 13, 2019

MIDWEEK

11

No1
FOR CRIME
MIDWEEK
MIDWEEK

SEX
COUPLE
BOOTED
OUT OF
MOSQUE
NICKED:
Selina
Dellaverde

(So they carried on outdoors)

A COUPLE who became intimate
in a mosque continued having
sex in the street when they
were thrown out by horrified
worshippers, a court heard.

Rashaan
Anderson-Williams,
24, and beauty consultant Selina
Dellaverde, 40, had been out
clubbing and were confronted by
locals attending an early morning
call to prayer at 6am.

Paul Rattigan, prosecuting, told
Blackfriars Crown Court: “They were
caught laying in some sort of intimacy
in the mosque.
“Many people were disturbed and
they were quickly ejected from the
mosque by worshipers.
“They were asked to leave but then
began having sex in the
street.”
The court was shown
body cam footage from a
police officer arresting
the couple for having sex
outside the Al-Nehar
mosque in Islington,
..
north London.
EMeBonElyR
REM
th

Mr Rattigan said:
We're give you
to
ones e ways to
“They admitted to some
all th t her...
contac that
sort of sexual intimacy
after
r

By ROY DURRIDGE
but denied that there was any sexual
intercourse.”
Adrian Lee, defending, said: “Mr
Anderson-Williams was embarrassed,
he is deeply regretful and remorseful.
“He knows his behaviour distressed
other people by going into a mosque.
It is not appropriate his three children
see him in that particular light.”
Judge John Hillen said the pair had
been “completely irresponsible” and
sentenced them to 80 hours’ community
service along with costs of £150.
He also banned them from entering
pubs or clubs for three months.
Anderson-Williams, of Enfield, and
Dellaverde, of Islington, both admitted
outraging public decency following

the incident on January 6.

WANNA MEET SOMEONE
ELSE’S WIFE FOR SEX?

Spunk swallower so
nearly had sticky end
A WOMAN suffered a
life-threatening allergic
reaction to penicillin
after giving her lover a
BLOWJOB.
The unnamed woman,
31, from Alicante, Spain,
SWALLOWED the semen
but began to vomit,
struggle to breathe and
broke out in hives.
Her partner had taken
amoxicillin-clavulanic acid
– a form of penicillin – for
an ear infection and
doctors believe her
anaphylactic shock was
caused by “seminal
transfer of amoxicillin”.

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12

MIDWEEK

March 13, 2019

GET THE SPORT ONLINE FREE FOR A MONTH! GO TO www.sundaysportonline.co.uk

HEROIN MISS GETS
10 YEARS
FOR SEX
WITH TEEN
PUPIL
DRUGS
BUST:
Staff and
students
noticed

Spencer
behaving
unusually

A HEROIN-smoking teacher
will serve a lengthy spell
behind bars after she
admitted having a sexual
relationship
with
an
underage student.

Raquel Spencer was jailed
for 10 years after pleading
guilty to sexual assault on
the youngster.
Spencer had been an English
teacher at Northwest Whitfield
High School in Whitfield
County, Georgia, since 2013,

By JAYNE FERGUSON


and was an assistant at
cheerleading and girls’ track
and field training.
She was arrested in April
2018 after staff and students

at school noticed her behaving
unusually and notified school
officials.
Spencer consented to a
search and heroin was found in
her locker.
A day later, additional
charges were added
when
investigators
determined
Spencer
was sexually involved
with the student, who
cannot be identified.

Crazy

They had discovered
evidence
of
the
relationship on her
mobile phone, but did
not go into specifics.
The Whitfield County
Sheriff’s Office, North
Georgia,
said
its

initial
investigation
revealed Spencer was
involved in a sexual

Country fan
Una lands
radio show
SATURDAYS singer Una
Healy is set to have her
own show on the UK’s
first national country
music radio station.
The 37-year-old star
(above) will host a
weekend programme on
Country Hits Radio.
The station launches
next month and will play
pop country music and
the artists that cross over
into the charts – with
acts like Keith Urban,
Kacey Musgraves and
Carrie Underwood.
Una, who rose to fame
in 2008 as a member of
the English-Irish girl
group, said she’s become
a big fan of country.

She added: “When you
look at the success of
artists such as The Shires
and Ward Thomas as well
as huge events like the
Country 2 Country music
festival, it’s clear there’s
a real audience for
country music in the UK.
“It’s a genre I’ve fallen
in love with – I can’t wait
to get started!”

Fact me!
relationship with the
underage student for at
least a year.
Spencer must also
serve 90 to 120 days in
a probation detention
center – a minimum
security facility that
provides
counselling,
life
skills
classes
and substance abuse
counselling.
She will pay a £1,000

fine plus court costs,
perform 300 hours of
community service and
observe all sex offender
special conditions of
probation.
A charge against
Spencer for possession

of
a
controlled
substance was dropped
as part of a plea
agreement.
One parent living in
the area said: “This is
crazy, the stuff of
nightmares.
“It’s the type of thing
that wouldn’t be out of
place in a movie.
“It’s bad enough that
this woman was taking
heroin into school and
even using it while she
was there.
“But on top of that, we
then discover she’s been
being having sex with

a student.
“It’s horrific.”

IN France,
there’s
a place
called Y

MASK-TURBATE
A FAT perv wearing just
a balaclava mask who
cycles around Kontich,
near Antwerp, Holland,
while furiously pulling
the end off his COCK is
being hunted by cops.

LOSING AN ARGUMENT?
FLOP YER TIT OUT!
BUSTY:
Olivia

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LOVE Island scorcher Olivia
Attwood got cheekier than

she ever has before – by undoing
her baby pink bathrobe in an
online semi-strip.
Revealing her ample cleavage
and narrowly avoiding a nip
slip on Instagram, the pretty
27-year-old stared into the
camera lens seductively.
Olivia captioned the shot:
“When you can feel yourself
losing the argument, so you

sneakily try and get a tit out.”
Her fans instantly rushed
to the comments section to
compliment the beauty.
One said: “I was going to
argue but instead I’ve spunked
in my kecks!”
Olivia rose to fame after she
reached the final of ITV’s hit
reality show Love Island in 2017.
She’s been dating Blackburn
Rovers midfielder Bradley Dack
since last year.


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March 13, 2019

MIDWEEK

Big-boob babes whip ‘em out for fun

FLASH
BANG

13

AALIYAH
JOHNSON

BUST MAGIC!
Sport legend Sarah

KNOCKERS!

GEMMA
ATKINSON

By GRACE HOOPER



LAST week we brought
you exclusive photos of
Sport
legend
Sarah

Longbottom flashing her
boobs in the street!

What a classic pose it
was…

A lady whipping the front of
her top down and jutting out
her boobs may not be a move
they teach at the very best
finishing schools, but it’s a
sure-fire way of getting into
the papers.
And with it also being
International Women’s Day
last week, what better way
for a woman to be assertive
and empowered than by
boldly flashing her top
bollocks?
We’ve pulled together
four amazing pages of
women
flashing
their
boobs and saying “what
the hell” to prides
and pronoses.
Enjoy!

CORALIE
LISA
APPLETON

GLAMOUR babe Coralie is never one to hide
her light under a bushel, or her boobs under
her bra, and happily the 34D Kensington
cutie feels equally passionate about
flashing ’em on a night out.
Our man with the camera caught up with
her in Fancy London’s West End.


14

MIDWEEK

GET THE SPORT ONLINE FREE FOR A MONTH! GO TO www.sundaysportonline.co.uk

March 13, 2019

JO GUEST

JAYDE
NICOLE

COCO
AUSTIN

CHELSEA

BARBER

SALLY
JONES

MELISSA
REEVES

ALICIA
DOUVALL


GET THE SPORT ONLINE FREE FOR A MONTH! GO TO www.sundaysportonline.co.uk

FLASH
BANG

SL !
K4-NPAOGECKSPER
ECIA

KATIE
SALMON

March 13, 2019

MIDWEEK

JESSICA
HAYES

NATALIE
DENNING

CLARE
RICHARDS
BIANCA
LAKE

AISLEYNE
HORGANWALLACE

CUTE Clare Richards is a massive fan of
flashing her boobs – both in photo shoots
and at CONCERTS!
The 32D beauty has lost count of the
times festivalgoers have copped a look at
her boobs.
The 25-year-old, from Wembley, north
London, said: “Flashing my boobs makes
me feel powerful.”

15


16

MIDWEEK

March 13, 2019

get the sport online free for a month! go to www.sundaysportonline.co.uk

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FLASH
BANG

SALLIE
AXL

March 13, 2019

MIDWEEK

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CUNNINGHAM

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ECIA
NATALIE

HARRIS
SAM
HEUSTON

JAMIE
JENKINS

JESS IMPIAZZI
ONE busty babe flashing her boobs is good
– but two is better!
We caught up with Jess Impiazzi and her
model pal Jamie Jenkins who whipped their
tops down in London’s Soho – just as a man
with a camera was passing.
Jamie said: “We got a lot of wolf whistles
that night!”

CHLOE
FERRY

17


18

MIDWEEK

GET THE SPORT ONLINE FREE FOR A MONTH! GO TO www.sundaysportonline.co.uk

March 13, 2019

OUR SERIES ON GANG BOSSES ENDS WITH

‘When he
of his
Capone

Baseball pair
electrocuted
at kids’ game
A FLORIDA high
school baseball coach
and his wife have been
killed by electrocution
while they installed
a new scoreboard, to
replace one destroyed
by a recent hurricane.
Coach Corey Crum
and a group of baseball
players and parents
were putting up the
scoreboard on Sunday
afternoon, said Liberty
County School board
member Kyle Peddle.
Kyle said the coach
was in “some kind of
lift and he got into an
electrical line”.

Mr Peddle, whose
son is also on the team,
said Mr Crum’s wife
Shana came to her
husband’s aid and was
also electrocuted.
The couple died at
the scene.
The couple’s son
Chase was also injured.
Liberty County
sheriff’s officials said
in a Facebook post that
team members were
taken to the gym,
where grief counsellors
were available.

THIS month marks the 90th anniversary of history’s most famous
mob hit – the St Valentine’s Day massacre.
Seven men were gunned down in broad daylight after being lured
to a garage in Chicago’s North Side expecting to take part in a
bootlegging deal.
Instead, they were found lying on the garage’s blood-soaked floor
side by side, victims of a ruthless battle between two gangs.
Legendary gangster Al Capone has always been assumed to have
been behind the slaughter of seven rivals, but to this day no one has
ever actually claimed responsibility.

DON’T MISS

THIS SUNDAY’S

By JUSTIN DUNN


JACKO – NEW
REVELATIONS
WHICH EVEN WE
FEEL NERVOUS
ABOUT
PRINTING!

Wacky cyclist is
going backwards
MOTORISTS were stunned
to see a man wearing a
headband, pink socks
and a thong as he rode a
bicycle backwards.
“Only in Miami,” said
one incredulous driver,
who recorded the incident
over the weekend and
posted it on social media.
One Twitter user wrote:
“I’m not gonna lie, the
dude’s got skills.”
According to the Florida
Highway Patrol, riding a
non-motorised vehicle on

a highway is illegal.

PART SIX

ALPHONSE
Gabriel
Capone was not a man
for changing his mind –
or even allowing others
an attempt to change it
for him.

He once famously said:
“In my life, all I have is
my word and my balls,
and I do not break them
for nobody.”
Capone spent just seven
years as a mob boss in
Chicago – but his reign
helped change the criminal
and political landscape of the
United States forever.
The most famous hit
attributed to him – but one he
never admitted – happened
on February 14, 1929.

Shot

On that day, a mob member
called Frank Gusenberg was
rushed to the hospital.
As soon as he had been
stabilised, cops arrived to
question him as to how he
had sustained the 14 gunshot
wounds that brought him in
– and, most importantly, who
had shot him.
“No one shot me,” he
replied.
Just three hours later,
Gusenberg was dead.
He
thus
became
the
final victim of a highly
orchestrated crime, Chicago’s

most infamous mob hit, which
would come to be known
as the St Valentine’s Day
Massacre.
The hit had been carefully
planned and executed by
notorious mobster Capone, to
eliminate a rival gang boss,
George “Bugs” Moran.

Bugs was a bootlegger and
rival
of
Capone’s,
who
distributed his illegal liquor
from
a
warehouse
on
Chicago’s North Side.
Though no one was ever
convicted of the crime, the
consensus is that Capone
orchestrated it to simply get
Bugs out of his way.
Moran had been working
on procuring a shipment of
stolen Canadian whiskey, an
enterprise which Capone was
already heavily invested in.

CAGED: Capone was held
in the infamous Alcatraz
maximum security prison
Those who believe Capone
orchestrated the murders
point out that the two mob
bosses had had plenty of
run-ins in the past over

territory
disputes
and
Bugs’ determination to take
over Capone’s suppliers.

Hit

The theory is that Capone
lured Bugs to a warehouse,
under the guise of readying
a car to drive to Canada,
and hit his rival before he
knew what happened.
Around 10.30am on that
February day, four men
raided Bugs’ Lincoln Park
warehouse.
Two were dressed as police
officers and armed with

submachine guns, the other
two wore suits, ties, overcoats
and hats.
Inside the warehouse were
five of Bugs’ men, along with
two car mechanics.
The last to arrive was
Albert Weinshank, whose
arrival signalled to the

armed men to carry out the
raid.
As Weinshank exited his
Cadillac on the street and
made his way into the
warehouse, he was accosted
by two police officers, who
forced him inside.
Believing he and his fellow
gangsters
were
being
arrested, they lined up
against the wall, their backs
to the police, all remaining

silent so as not to out their
boss.
As soon as the men were
in line, the police officers
signalled
to
the
two
plainclothes men waiting
outside, armed with the
submachine guns.
Before Bugs’ men knew
what hit them, the armed
men opened fire, emptying

an entire 20-round box
magazine and a 50-round
drum into the men.

Mistake

They continued shooting
even after all seven men had
hit the floor.
The men dressed as officers
then escorted the assassins
out of the building, under the
guise of arresting them.
They then fled the scene,
remaining unidentified to
this day.
All seven of Bugs’ men


THE MOST FAMOUS NAME OF ALL...

MIDWEEK

WE THREE
KINGS OF
ORIENT...

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March 13, 2019

19

found out three
men were rats
rats,, AARGH!
beat them to
a pulp with a
baseball bat’
Passenger
throttles
carol
singing
van driver

A VAN passenger was arrested after cops
say he CHOKED the driver because he
was singing Christmas carols in March.

Clayton Lucas, 25, told police he began to
strangle the driver because he was singing
festive songs and refused to stop.
Police responded around 9am to a car parked
along Route 28 in East Deer, Pittsburgh, for what
they understood to be a
By GRACE HOOPER
medical emergency.
A
state
trooper

spotted the Chrysler
Town
and
Country result, Lucas tried to
minivan parked on the choke him to make him
hard shoulder, with two stop singing.
men on the other side
It is not known which
of the guide rail.
carols the driver was
singing – or why – but
Drugs
sources claim drugs or
The victim told the alcohol may have been
trooper
that
Lucas involved.
reached around his seat
The victim said Lucas
while he was driving restricted the air and
and began choking him. blood from around his
Police
said
Lucas neck to the point he
would not listen when was about to pass out.
the state trooper tried
Afterwards, his neck
to handcuff him.
was red and his eyes

After several verbal were bloodshot.
commands, he ended up
Lucas (above) faces
having to sweep Lucas’s charges of aggravated
legs from under him.
assault, simple assault,
The victim told the strangulation, resisting
trooper he was singing arrest and disorderly
Christmas songs. As a conduct.

SLAUGHTERED:
Victims of the
St Valentine’s
Day Massacre

died, six instantly and Frank
Gusenberg later that day.
But the original target,
Bugs Moran, was never
injured.
In fact, he had never even
made it to the warehouse.
The assassins had made
a
mistake
when
Albert
Weinshank, roughly the same
height and build as Moran,
arrived dressed in an identical

outfit to the man.
It wasn’t until after the
massacre, when Bugs made a
public statement condemning
Capone, that it was realised
that he was still alive.
The ensuing investigation
focused primarily on Capone
and his affiliate, the Purple
Gang.
Despite two eyewitnesses
and several identifications,
most of the public believed
what the killers wanted them
to – that the attack had been

carried out by the police as a
scare tactic.
One man, Fred Burke, a
known associate of Capone’s,
was arrested years later for a
separate crime and found to be
in possession of the guns that
were used in the massacre.
Burke denied involvement
with the crime.
Capone was later arrested
for his many other crimes and
spent 11 years in prison.

Killed

Even then, however, he
never took credit for the
St Valentine’s Day Massacre
– and to this day, the
actual perpetrators are still
unknown.
No matter the case, there’s
no doubt that the hit carried
Capone’s distinct style.
He once infamously killed
three of his own associates
after learning they were

planning to betray him.
During a charade concocted
for their benefit, Capone
staged an argument with a
trusted bodyguard in front of
two of his wise guys and then
slapped the guard, who ran
from the room.
Both of the men tracked him
down and fatally offered to
bring him in on their plans.
After confirmation of the
treachery, an elaborate ruse
was developed to get rid of
the plotters.

At the climax of a dinner
thrown in their honour,
Capone produced a baseball
bat and beat the three men
within an inch of their lives,
before two or three gunmen
stepped in to finish the job.
Capone was public enemy
number one, but because of
his corrupt ties to police
and politicians, authorities
struggled to pin him down.

Finally, in 1931, two years
after the massacre, he was
prosecuted for tax evasion.
During a highly publicised
case, the judge admitted as
evidence Capone’s admissions
of his income and unpaid taxes
during prior negotiations to
pay the government taxes he
owed.
He was convicted and
sentenced to 11 years in prison.
After conviction, he replaced
his defence team with experts
in tax law, and his grounds for
appeal were strengthened by
a Supreme Court ruling, but

his appeal ultimately failed.

Dementia

Capone showed signs of
syphilitic dementia early in
his sentence and became
increasingly debilitated before
being released after eight
years of incarceration.
On January 25, 1947, aged
just 48, Capone died of
cardiac arrest after suffering
a stroke.
He took the truth about the
St Valentine’s Day massacre
to his grave.


20

MIDWEEK

March 13, 2019

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BRITAIN’S
BIGGEST
SEX LIES!

By MAX RADLEY

THE 10 biggest sex lies told by both men
and women have been revealed.

Women’s most popular lie is to reduce the real
number of men they have slept with.

More than half of women (52 per cent) said they
had cut the real figure of their past lovers when
talking about previous relationships with a new
lover or friends.
Men’s most popular lie was to deny ever cheating
on a previous partner.
Four out of 10 men (44 per cent) said they hidden
previous infidelity because they were worried it
would put off a new lover.
The results are in a
new survey of 2,000 men
and women, split evenly
between the sexes, by
1. Reducing the real
IllicitEncounters.com,
number of men they
the UK’s leading dating
have slept with
site for married people.
2. Faking an orgasm
The second biggest
female sex lie was to

3. Saying I love you
fake an orgasm – 46 per
when I don’t mean it
cent of women have
4. We have sex all the
done this.
time
5. I never fantasise
Masturbate
about sex with other
men
In third place was
saying ‘I love you’ when
6. I’ve got a headache
they don’t really mean it
7. I never cheat on a
followed by lying to
partner
friends about how much
8. The sex was great!
sex they’re having with
9. I don’t enjoy porn
a new partner.
10. I don’t masturbate
The second biggest
male sex lie was denying
they ever watch porn,
chosen by 42 per cent of
male respondents, and
1. I never cheat on a

third was saying they
partner
rarely masturbate (36
2. I never watch porn
per cent).
3. I rarely masturbate
In fourth place was
4. You look great!
telling a white lie about
5. Increasing the real
a woman looking great
number of women they
then about the number
have slept with
of past lovers – but
6. I usually last a lot
unlike women, 28 per
cent of men are likely to
longer
increase rather than
7. Saying I love you
decrease their total.
when I don’t mean it.
IllicitEncounters.com
8. The sex was great!
spokesman
Christian
9. I just want to sleep
Grant said: “Both sexes
–honest!

like to tell sex lies but it
10. I never fantasise
is interesting to discover
about sex with other
just how different those
women
lies are.”

WOMEN TOP 10

MEN TOP 10

Woman saws off hand for compo
A WOMAN has been accused of deliberately cutting off
her hand with a CIRCULAR SAW for an insurance claim.
The 21-year-old and a relative are still in custody and
face up to eight years in jail if convicted.
The woman, who recently took out injury insurance,
stood to gain £340,000 in compensation plus monthly
payments of £2,600 from the policy.
Four members of the family, who said she had injured
herself while sawing branches, were held then released.
Police say the group deliberately cut the woman’s
hand above the wrist at their home in Ljubljana, Slovenia.
The group left the severed hand behind rather than
bring it to hospital – to make the disability permanent –
but medics recovered it in time to sew it back on.

#HO

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March 13, 2019

MIDWEEK

21

T ’N ’ H O R N Y
A

WESOME Alexa Grace has a
secret passion – she loves to
have sex outdoors, preferably
when there’s a risk of being caught!
The 23-year-old 32C Leicester
babe said: “I remember once an old
boyfriend of mine and I went for a
Sunday afternoon stroll along a
canal bank.
“It was a really hot summer’s day
and we were both soon feeling really
horny.
“I took his hand and led him into
some bushes near the canal bank and
we started to undress each other.
“I could feel his cock stiffening
with excitement and I was ready to
take it all. I was that moist.

“I decided I’d tease him by giving
him a blowjob first.
“He was nearly ready to explode
when a party boat with a bunch of
lads drinking beer went past and
they caught sight of us.
“The cheers could be heard for
miles. And we didn’t disappoint them
as we carried on and I ended up with
my face covered in my fella’s juice.”

SPEW
IDIOT!
Boozer mistook his
own vomit for blood

A DRUNK got behind the wheel
of his car after he mistook his
own vomit for blood and feared
someone had been murdered.

SCENE OF NO
CRIME: Hotel

Darren Wharton pleaded guilty to
drink-driving his Volkswagen Golf
when he appeared before JPs.

alexa

GRACE

Wharton, 44, was found to be nearly
double the legal limit when he drove
after drinking with work colleagues in
Workington, Cumbria, on December 9.
Diane Jackson, prosecuting, told the
town’s magistrates: “The defendant
was staying at the Washington Central
Hotel following a work night out. He
believed he saw blood all over the bed.”
The court heard that Wharton then
left his room, became “agitated” and
decided he needed to get
He told the court: “It
away from the hotel.
By ROY DURRIDGE
was a matter of a panic.
“He believed that he’d

He
said he called police
witnessed a murder,”
because he thought
Ms Jackson added.
he believed there was there was a greater
Lager
crime going on. He
blood everywhere.”
Wharton’s

defence, thought that someone
Wharton climbed into
had been hurt.”
Chris
Toms,
asked
the
his car and drove a short
Wharton, of Carlisle,
distance.
Then
he District Judge to take
decided to call the into account that he had Cumbria, was banned
believed there was an from driving for 18
police, the court heard.
months and fined £500.
When they arrived he emergency.
urged them to check the
his hotel room.
Ms
Jackson
said:
“They discovered that
what he believed to be
A 91-YEAR-OLD was among 18 men suspected of
blood was his vomit,
kerb-crawling who were nicked by cops, during a
which was red.
seven-hour anti-hooker effort.
“He said to the officer:

During the operation, undercover female police
‘What an idiot, I’ll lose
officers posed as prostitutes to lure the men, but were
my job for this’.
stunned that the OAP was among those snared.
“When interviewed,
Several “Johns” who saw the officers reportedly
he said he’d had several
pints of lager and didn’t
pulled over looking to buy sex in Pomona, California,
remember going to bed.
only to get their collars, not their penises, felt.
“He panicked because

Man, 91, snared by ‘hookers’


22

MIDWEEK

March 13, 2019

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IN THIS SUNDAY’S

ALAN
PARTRIDGE
BABES

FLASH
THEIR
ALPHA
BAPPERS!
SUSANNAH
FIELDING

HIS SEXY
CO-STARS
STRIP OFF

JULIA DAVIS

MINNIE
DRIVER

SPECIAL TOPLESS FEATURE
100% GENUINE PICS

A-HA! THEY’RE SO A-HORNY!

AMELIA
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AND
LOADS
MORE!


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‘Bent’ vice cop
paid hookers
for sex romps
A BENT copper forced
women to have sex
with him under threat
of arrest, pressured
others to help cover
up crimes and lied to
investigators when he
said he’d never had
sex with prostitutes.
Vice squad Officer
Andrew Mitchell, 55,
was arrested and
charged with witness
tampering, obstruction
of justice, making a
false statement to
federal investigators,
and deprivation of rights.
A federal indictment
accused Mitchell
(above) – a 30-year
veteran of the force in
Columbus, Ohio – of
arresting two different
women and forcing
them to have sex before

he released them.
Later, during the
federal investigation,
Mitchell lied when he
told the FBI he’d never
had sex with a hooker,
since Mitchell knew
“he has had sex with
numerous prostitutes,
including having paid
women money for sex”,
said the indictment.
Mitchell plans to
fight the charges and
enter a not guilty plea,
his attorney said.

March 13, 2019

MIDWEEK

23

FOR YOU!

Your chance to own piece of porn
history as cab goes up for sale
GROT fans have the chance
to own a piece of porn
history – a taxi used to film

more than 200 sex scenes.

The Fake Taxi porn firm is
one of Britain’s most successful
adult film makers and has
shot scenes with legends like
Georgie Lyall and Michelle
Thorne getting rogered senseless.

The premise starts with an
“unsuspecting” porn actress as she
climbs into the back a black cab
which is wired up with cameras.
And that means when they then
take a huge cock in all their holes
they are filmed from every angle.
But now the original taxi from
the series is up for sale.
Sadly, it had to be withdrawn
from eBay after it was revealed
the sellers hadn’t cleaned all the

By NICKY ADAMS


spunk off the back seats.
A source said: “This is a piece
of history and the lucky new
owner will able to revel in the fact
that more jizz has been spilled

in that cab than any other vehicle
in history.

Annoyed

“We’re a bit annoyed that it
was taken off eBay but we’ve got
lots of people interested and are
now working on a final sale.
“Unfortunately, despite the
huge historical interest,
the National Trust weren’t
interested in taking it off
our hands.
“Ah well…their loss!”

STARLETS: Georgie
(right) and Michelle
have both shagged
in the famous cab

Fact me!
THE Eye of the Tiger
song was created
as the theme for
Rocky III because
Queen wouldn’t give
Sylvester Stallone
the rights to use
their hit Another

One Bites the Dust.

COP FOR THAT

TO VISIT OUR FULLY EQUIPPED

NORTH WEST BASED PREMISES PHONE:

A WOMAN, 25, was
nicked for drink driving
after she took her car
for a spin on the wrong
side of the road outside
a POLICE STATION in
Queenstown, New Zealand.

Madam Amanda on
07966 519 614

FOR TV - AB - ABDL & SISSY VISITS

TELLY KATH FINGERING
STORM
TELLY viewers were shocked when actress
Katherine Kelly was seen FINGERING her
MINGE in public.

The former Coronation Street star’s character in
new ITV drama Cheat writhed in pleasure as
she performed a solo sex act in a toilet cubicle at

the university where
she works.
By SUZY SHELDON
In the graphic scene,

lecturer Leah is caught
out as she fantasises Stephan has walked
about a male colleague.
into the room and
Leah, who is trying for started kissing her.
a baby in her unhappy
Things get amorous in
marriage with Adam, the fantasy as he pins
thinks she’s alone when her up against the wall
she gets a over-excited.
and shoves his hands
After walking into the down her trousers while
toilets, she imagines kissing her neck.
Leah breathes heavily
that her hunky colleague

as she gives herself over
to the pleasure as it’s
revealed she’s actually
alone in the cubicle.
The camera then cuts
to the sinks outside,
where Leah has left her
bag and ID badge, and
where someone is seen

washing their hands.
Leah stops when she
hears the tap running,
aware that she’s been
caught mid-wank.

The four-part
drama
series,
which continues
tonight, featured
a number of sex
scenes in its first
episode.
But some viewers
seemed embarrassed
by the on-screen action.
One said: “Thought
this would be good for
me and mum but 5 mins
in someone’s wanking!”

1-2-1 CALLBACKS ONLY £11 FOR 5 MINS

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MIDWEEK

March 13, 2019

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#POSTER BABE

rhian

26, 32E-25-34,
from Bury,
Gtr Manchester

SUGDEN


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EK
WE
MI D

R
E
V
CO L

GIR

March 13, 2019

MIDWEEK

25