Rogues company

ROGUES&COMPANY
BY
IDAA.R.WYLIE
AUTHOROF
“CHILDRENOFSTORM,”“TOWARDSMORNING,”ETC.
NEWYORK
JOHNLANECOMPANY
MCMXXI
COPYRIGHT,1921,BYINTERNATIONALMAGAZINECOMPANY
COPYRIGHT,1921,BYJOHNLANECOMPANY
PressofJ.J.Little&IvesCompanyNewYork,U.S.A.
ROGUES&COMPANY


CHAPTERI
ITwasaverycuriousanddecidedlyuncomfortablefeeling,andthoughhehada
dimideathathehadfeltitsomewherebefore,hecouldremembernothingmore
definiteaboutit.Asamatteroffactitwasinitselfnothingsoveryunusualmost
peopleexperiencethesamesensationsonwakingupatdeadofnightinstrange
quarters.Onsuchoccasionsthevictimgrowshotandfeverishintheendeavour
tolocatethedoorandwindow;hecannotrememberwhoheis,whereheisor
howhegotthere;hefeelspainfullylostandhelpless.Then,gradually,his
facultiesrubtheireyesandarrangethemselves,andthefactthatheisJones,that
heisspendingtheweek-endwiththeSmiths,andthattheuncannyapartmentis
nothingmoreterriblethantheirbestsparebed-room,dawnsonhimwith
comfortingcompleteness,andheturnsoverandresumeshisinterrupted
slumbers.
Butinthiscasetheexperiencewaslesspleasantinitsdevelopmentand
considerablymoreoriginal.Themorewide-awakehegrewthelessheknew
abouthimself.Themorehesaidtohimself,“Mydearfellow,pullyourself

togetherit’sonlyadream,”themoreobviousdiditbecomethathewassitting
onthedoorstepofanunknownhouseinanunknownstreet,withachinglimbs
andanachinghead.Nowsuchacombinationofcircumstancesisnotaltogether
unusualeveninthebestsociety,andhesatandpatientlywaitedforan
illuminatingmemory.Butnonecame.Ifhehad,asheatfirstsupposed,supped
notwiselybuttoowell,wherehadhesuppedandwithwhom?Therewasno
answertothisnaturalquestion.Heshookhimself.
“Oh,comenow!”hesaidaloud.“Surelyyouknowyourownname?”
Againnoanswer.Evidentlyithadbeenabigbusiness.Whenamanhastoresort
tohisownvisitingcardtofindoutwhoheisonemaybeforgivenforsupposing
thatthisself-forgetfulnessissomethinglessthanpurealtruism.Themanonthe
doorstepresignedhimselftonecessityandputhishandinhistrouserpocket.
Nothing.Theothertrouserpocketwasalsoemptylikewisethewaistcoatpocket.
Thiswasdisconcerting.Whatwasstillmoredisconcertingwastheholeinthe
kneeofhistrousersasrevealedbythelightofastreet-lamp,andhethereupon
madethediscoverythatfarfrombeingin.evening-dress,ashiscondition
suggested,heworeachecksuitofvulgartypeandancientlineage,andthathe
wascufflessandcollarless.Allthiswasverysurprisingandpainful.He


addressedhimselfwithseverity.
“Really,mydearfellow,thiswon’tdocan’tsitouthereallnight,youknownot
done—”
AtthisjunctureConstableX.oftheD.Divisionloomeduponthehorizon.
ConstableX.carriedalanternandwasevidentlyonthelookoutforburglarsand
othermiscreants,forhedidnotnoticethemanonthedoorstepuntilhehad
stumbledoverhislegs.WhattheConstablesaidisirrelevant.Themanonthe
doorstepapologisedprofusely.
“I’msureI’mextremelysorry,”hesaid.Hisownpromptpolitenessledhimat
oncetotheconclusionthathisstation’inlifemustbesomethingbetweenashopwalkerandagentleman,butthisopinionwasapparentlynotsharedbyhis

victim.ConstableX.flashedhislanternontothedoorstepandgaveventtoa
snortofmingledtriumphandindignation.
“Atitagain!Eh?”hesaid.“Gotyouthistime,haveI?”
“Itlookslikeit,”hisprisoneradmitted.“Wereyoulookingforme?”
“Nowthen,noneofyourtongue,youngfellow!Wotd’yermean?”
“Imean,”saidthemanonthedoorstepcourteously,“thatitwouldbeagreat
relieftometoknowthatsomeonewaslookingforme—evenapoliceman.The
factis,youknowI’mlost.”
“Oh,soyou’relost,areyou?”TheConstablelaughedwiththerudenesswhichis
bornofashatteredtrustinhumannature.“Sortoflostdog,eh?”
“ThedesignationwilldountilIfindabetterone,”returnedtheother,wearily.
“ButIdoubtifeventheDog’sHomewilltakemein.WhatamItodo?”
“Moveon!”saidtheConstable,fromsheerforceofhabit.
“ButIcan’tkeepon‘movingon’indefinitely.”
TheConstablescratchedhishead.
“You’dbettercomealongwithme,”hesaid.


“MightIaskwhither?”
“Lock-up,”wasthelaconicanswer.
“ButIhaven’tdoneanything.”
“Can’tbesosureofthatandanyhow,you’resittingonsomeoneelse’s
doorstep.”
“Youdon’tknowthatitissomeoneelse’sdoorstep.Itmightbemine.”
“Itmightbutitdon’tlooklikeit.”
“Youinfer,”hiscaptivesuggested,“thatIdonotgiveyoutheimpressionof
beingalandedproprietor?”
“Can’tsayasyoudo,”ConstableX.admittedfrankly.“Yougivesmethe
impressionofbeingaverycommonsortofnight-bird.”
Themanonthedoorstepshookhishead.

“Youjudgetoohastily,”heprotested.“IfIam,asyousuggest,anight-bird,I
havenonethelessthefeelingthatImayturnouttobeoneofnature’s
gentlemen.Now,lookhere!”Herosestifflyandpainfullyandconductedthe
doubtingConstabletothelamp.“Whatdoyoumakeofthat!”heenquired
triumphantly.Heextendedhistwohands.ConstableX.consideredthemwithhis
headcockedastutelyononeside.
“Cleanish,”hesaid.“Uncommoncleanish.”
“Sergeant,youareamanofperception.Now,glanceoverme.Donotlet
yourselfbeledastraybythevulgarityofmycostume.Considermyface,my
mannerandmyspeech.Whatdoyouthinkofme?”
“Well,youmightbeasortofgent,”ConstableX.admitted.
“Inspector—”theyoungmanbegan.
“Notyet,sir—”ConstableX.protestedwithatouchofcoyness.
“Nevermind,yououghttobeaninspector,evenifyouaren’t.Iwasjudgingyou


asyoujudgedmebydeserts.IfeelthatIoughttobeagentleman,I’msureyou
oughttobeaninspector.ButthetroublewithmeisthatIdon’tknowwhoor
whatIam.”
“Drunk,”suggestedtheinspectorinembryo,consolingly.
“ImayhavebeeninthepastbutIamcertainlysobernow.”
“Yes,youtalksclearenough.Gotawishingcardonyou?”
“IfIhad,thematterwouldbesimplified.Mypocketsareasemptyasmyhead.”
TheConstable’ssmilewasunflattering.
“Can’tyourememberanythink?”heappealed.
“Notathing.I’vebeentryingforthelasthalf-hour.What’stobedone?Ican’t
stayonthestreetsallnightandasfarasIknowIhaven’tanyclaimonany
charitableinstitution.”
ConstableX.rubbedhischin.
“It’sacaseoflostmemory,”heannouncedsolemnly.“I’ve‘eardofitbefore.I

knewofanoldladywhowanderedover‘alfLondonbeforetheyfoundoutthat
shewasaduchess’Itwasabigthingforthemanwhofound‘er.”
“NothinglikesobigasitwouldbeforyouifyoufoundIwasaduke,”
interposedthelostonegenerously.“IfIamadukesolventofcourseIshallraise
youtoapositionofaffluency.IswearitbymyancestorssupposingIhaveany.”
ConstableX.touchedhishelmet.
“Thankyou,sir,”hesaidwithconsiderablymorerespect.“It’sacaseforthe
doctorsthat’swotitis,”hewentonthoughtfully,“wottheycallsaspecialist.The
duchesswasqueerinherupperstorey—seniledecay,astheycalledit.”
“Goodheavens,I’mnotasoldasthat,amI?”
”‘Tain’talwaysagethatdoesit,”ConstableX.returned,withagraveand
significantshakeofthehead.“There’sdecaysanddecays.You’vegot‘emyoung


that’sall.”
“Supposewefindthedoctor?”suggestedtheyoungmanhastily.
“You’resittingon‘isdoorstep.”
Theprospectivepatientexaminedthedoorplate.
“Mr.Smedley,”hereadaloud,“veterinarysurgeon.Lookhere,Inspector,that
won’tdo.I’mnotananimal.”
“Yousaidyouwasalostdog,”retortedtheConstable,withgrimdelightinhis
ownjest.“Well,anyhow,there’saDoctorThingummyroundthecorner.Icalls
‘imThingummybecause‘e‘asaforeignname,andIdon’t‘oldwithforeign
names.Notsincethattherewar.Iup’oldstheLawmyself,butwotIsaysis,
‘WhenanEnglishmanseesaforeignerheortterbash‘imintheeye,’Idon’t
carewhoheis–”
“Well,perhapsDr.Thingumityonlysoundsforeign,”theyoungmansuggested.
“Anyhow,we’llgivehimacall.Whattimeisit?”
“Aboutmidnight.”
“Inthatcase,”theyoungmanreflected,“Ifancythatweshallbethebashedones

bashedandabashed,youknow.”Hechuckledencouragingly,buthiscompanion
remainedunmoved.“However,anythingisbetterthanthelock-upandthecold
stoneofMr.Smedley’ssteps.Leadon,Macduff.”
“Lookhere,youngfeller,ifyoustartcallingnames—”
“I’mnot.I’mquoting.Ican’trememberwhatfromBibleprobably.Anyhow,
absolutelyrespectable.Wouldn’tinsultyoufortheworld.Why—”heexclaimed
witharushofpathos“youmaybemyonlyfriend,Constable.”
“Well,mindout.It’saslikelyasnotyou’reunderarrest,inwhichcaseanything
yousaywillbetakendownagainstyou.”
“ButI’mnotacriminal.”
“Can’tbesure.Youcouldn’tsweartoityourself.”


“Well,Idon’tlooklikeoneatleastIdon’tfeellikeone.”
ConstableX.shookhisheadgloomily.
“Can’tgobythat.IfyouknewwotIknewaboutcriminals,you’dbesurprised.
Therewasafelleraniceupstandingchap,aspleasantspokenasyouplease
murderedhiswife,hedid.‘Why,Constable,’hesaidtomegoinguptothedock,
‘Iwouldn’t‘urtakitten.’AndIbelieved‘im.But‘iswifeshegoton‘isnerves
shewasalwaysahummin’tunesto‘erself,andthemoreheasked‘ernotthe
moreshedidit.Andoneday,rightinthemiddleof‘AnnieLaurie,’heupsand
‘its‘eroverthe‘eadwith‘isbeer-mug.Must‘avecaught‘eron‘ersoftspot,for
shenever‘ummedagain.But‘eswungforit,poorchap,thoughthejurydidput
inextenuatingcircumstances.No,sir,youbelieveme,youcan’tbesureof
anyoneinthislife—leastofallyourself.”
Theyoungmanputhishandtohisforehead.
“Constable,I’masickman.Youdon’twantmetofaint,doyou?”
“I’monlydoingmydooty,sir.Boundtowarnyou—”
“Iknowyoumeanitkindly,”theyoungmanadmittedhumbly.“Butit’sallvery
uncomfortable.”

Thatmuch,atanyrate,wasbecomingcertain.Forthefirstfewminuteshis
positionhadstruckhimasentirelyhumorous.Hehadexpectedeachminuteto
bringthedesiredflashofillumination,buthismindhadremainedblank,andthe
painatthebackofhisheadwasbecomingtroublesomelyinsistent.Whoand
whatwashe?Hedecidedthatitwasagreatdealworsethanbeingbornagain,
becauseoftheadditionalunpleasantnessofknowingbeforehandalltheawful
conditionsintowhichonemightbeflungbyarecklessandindiscriminating
Fate.HemightbeaDukehehopedhewasbuthefelthisappearancewas
againsthim.Hemightbewhathisclothessuggested,whichwasintolerable.He
mightbemarried,andhiswifemightbeAtthispointthepossibilitiesnearly
overcamehim,andhewasthankfulforthetoniceffectoftheConstable’sgrip
uponhisarm.
“Hearthat,sir?”
“Soundslikesomeonerunning,”thederelictadmitted.“Someonelookingfor


me,nodoubt—”
Thenextinstantanextraordinaryapparitiontoreroundthecornerofthestreet
andwasreceivedfullinConstableX.‘sgeniallyoutstretchedarms.The
constablerosetothesituationwiththesamesangfroidthathehaddisplayed
earlierintheevening.
“Sothereyouare!”hesaid.“Gotyou,‘avel?”
HiscaptureshowednointelligentappreciationoftheConstable’ssmartness.He
brokeintoanincoherenttorrentofbadlanguageand,disengaginghimselfwitha
dexteroustwist,revealedhimselfasonementIcan
offer.
“Yourdevotedandunhappyhusband,
“TheRogue.”

“Areyouready,oldbird?”
WilliamBrown,ashewastobefromhenceforth,startedtohisfeet,andthen,as
hesawthegrinningfaceinthedoorway,noddedacurtassent.
“Yes.”
“Coastclear?”
“YeswaitamomentthoughtillIhaveaddressedthisenvelope.”
“Partinglove-letter,eh?”
“Holdyourtongue!”
Georgegrimacedrudely.WilliamBrownfinishedhistaskinsternsilence.Then,
ashethrewthependownwithasighofbittersatisfaction,hecaughtsightofa
secondenvelopeaddressedtohim,proppedupagainstavase,withthe
injunction“nottobeopenedtilltomorrowmorning.”Thisletterhethrustinto
hispocket.
“AreyoucomingorareyouwaitingforyourescorttotakeyoutoBuckingham
Palace?”
“I’mcomingI’mcoming!”
Amomentlaterbothmenstoodtogetherinthequietpassage.Downstairsthey
heardthesubduedstrainsofmusicandthehumofvoices.Georgeputhisfinger
tohisnose.
“Granddoings,”hesaidbriefly.“Theroadisasclearasitcouldbe.Tryandlook
innocent,dearboy,andcomealong.MylittlefriendSusanhasgivenmethekey
toNo.36itwillbeaseasyasflying—”
“—andaboutassafe,”commentedtheRoguegloomily.
Georgechuckledbutmadenoanswer,andinsilencetheyproceededdownthe
corridor.Theirprogresswasopenandevenostentatious.Thechamber-maidwho
badethemgood-nightdidnoteventroubletolookafterthemandyawnedher
waybacktoherownquarters.


“Now!”saidGeorgequietly.

TheyhadreachedroomNo.36.Georgestopped,tookakeyfromhispocketand
fitteditintothelock.
“Susanistomeetmeoutsidethegates,”heobservedcasually.“Ihopethedear
littlethingwon’tcatchcold.”
Butonthiscynicalhopehiswretchedpartnermadenocomment.Thekeyturned
easily,andwithagracefullyinvitinggestureGeorgemotionedWilliamBrown
intothedarkandsilentroom.Bothdarknessandsilenceoppressedthelatterwith
aneerieprescienceofdanger,buthesaidnothingandclenchedhischattering
teeth,desperatelyintentonseeingthebusinessthrough.
“Thesafe’soverbythewindow,”hiscompanionwhispered.“Takethiselectric
torchandturnitonwhenItellyou.Wemustn’tbewastefulwiththegas.”
Ontip-toebothmencrossedtheroomtothespotwhichGeorgehadindicated.A
smalltravellingsafeofdeterminedappearancehadbeensetagainstthewalland,
obeyingacurtcommand,theRogueswitchedonthetorch.Itsstraightstreamof
lightfellonthelockandtherewasasoftclinkofsteelinstrumentsasGeorgeset
towork.ThebusinessfilledWilliamBrownwithindescribableandunnatural
horror.Itwasinsultaddedtoinjurythathecouldn’tevenbedishonestwitha
goodconscience.Whateverhehadbeeninthepasthewasnowahopeless
failure.“I’llhavetogostraight,”hethought.“Ican’tstandthissortofthingany
moreIsimplycan’t.”Hewas,infact,sufferingacutely.Everyhoarseraspofthe
fileseemedtovibratedownhisbackboneandGeorge’sbreathingmagnified
itselfinhisearstothestentoriansnortingofabull.Helookednervouslyabout
him.Ashadowmoved.Heattributeditatfirsttothelightthensuddenlyafearful
suspiciongrewtoablood-curdlingcertainty.
“George!”hewhispered.“There’ssomebodyintheroomthere—behindthe
wardrobe—”
Thenextinstantthetorchwasdashedfromhishand.Hefelthimselfhalf
dragged,halfcarriedtotheopenwindowandbeforehehadtimetouttermore
thanagaspofprotesthewasflyingthroughahorriblespacewhichended
suddenlyanduncomfortablyinthemouldymoistnessofaflower-bed.Choking,

hismouthandeye?andnosefullofthedampearth,theRoguescrambledtohis
feet.Theroomwhichhehadleftthusunceremoniouslywasnowbrightlylitand


excitedshadowsranbackwardsandforwardsagainsttheyellowbackground.
Buthehadnotimetoconsiderthesituation.Afigureroseupfromtheflower
bedbesidehimandgrippedhimbythearm.
“We’remugged!”Georgespluttered.“Thatvixen—thatblue-eyedcathasdone
me.Nevertrustawoman—never.There’snothingforitbuttoshowacleanpair
ofheels.Thegate’snogood.Makeforthewall.Afterthattryforthestationin
timefortheexpress.I’llkeeptothewoods.Offwithyou!”
Hisconfederatewaitedfornomore.Theinstinctofself-preservationlenthima
speedandagilitywithwhichhewouldneverhaveaccreditedhimself.Thefivefootwallmighthavebeentwofeetthetwomilestothestationthirtyyards.No
oneintervenedtocheckhiswildprogressthoughheswervedateveryshadow,
andatlastthelightofBunmouthStationhoveinsight.Breathless,gaspingand
hatless,hedrewupatthebooking-office.Theinstinctofself-preservationhad
forgottentolendhimameasureofcommonsense,forhisstatewouldhave
arousedthesuspicionsofanangel.Herealisedthisfactashepassedthebarrier
andfacedthefamiliarstationmaster.Instinctivelyhepulledhimselfuptomeet
theworst.Tohisutteramazementthegentlemanindarkbluemerelytouchedhis
cap.
“Closeshave,yourlordship,”hesaidpleasantly.“Youseemtohavehadarun
forit.”
“Ihave,”WilliamBrownadmittedtruthfully.
“Anotherminuteandyou’dhavemissed,”thestationmasterwenton.“I’ve
reservedacompartmenthigherup.”
WilliamBrownshookhisheadfeeblyasthoughprotestingagainstthecrazy
vagariesoffortune,butfollowedunresisting.Theexpresswasalreadymovingas
theguardunlockedthedoorofafirst-classcompartment.
“Thereyouare!”hesaid.“Justintime,sir!”

Thedoorwasslammedtoandthefugitiveheardnomore.Hebrokedown
helplesslyinacornerseatanddidnotmoveuntilthelightsofthestationhad
disappearedroundacurve.Thenforthefirsttimeherealisedthathewasnot
alone.Helookedupandencounteredthehorrified,bewilderedgazeofthe
CountessTheodora.


CHAPTERXVII
THEYstaredateachotherforafullminuteinfranklyaghastsilence.The
Countess’sfacewaswhiterthanmarble;theperspirationstoodoutinbeadson
theCount’sforehead.Thriceheessayedtospeakandtwicefailed.Thethirdtime
hemanagedtobringouthername.
“Theodora!”
“Louis!”
“Whatintheworldareyoudoinghere?”
Shedrewherselfupdefiantly.
“I’mrunningaway.”
“Fromme?Ah,Iunderstand!”Heputhisshakinghandtohiscollar.“Youhave
readmyletteryouknoweverything?”
“Yourletter?Ihaveithere.IfounditonyourtablebutIhavenotreadit.”
“Notreadit?Thenwhyareyouhere?Whyareyourunningaway?Ah—itisthat
Saunders—thatscoundrel—”
“Louisdon’tyouunderstand?Whatareyoutalkingabout?Haven’tyougotmy
note?”
“Yournote?”
Hisjawdropped.Mechanicallyhetookthecrumpledenvelopefromhispocket
andconsidereditasthoughitmighthavebeenabomb.
“Ihadn’ttime,”hestammered.“Idon’tunderstandanythingatall.”
“Thenwhyareyouhere?Whyhaveyoucomeafterme?HowdidyouknowI
wasinthistrain?”

“Know?”WilliamBrownclaspedhishandsinmuteappealtotheunseen


powers.“Ididn’tknow.OtherwiseI’dratherhavebeenhanged,drawnand
quarteredthanhavegotintothiscarriage.”
“Then—”Sheendeavouredtosteadythetremblingofherlips.“Ireallythinkit
wouldbesimplerifwebothreadourletters,”shesaiddesperately.
“Itseemslikeit,”Brownadmitted.
Insilencetheytoreopentheirrespectiveenvelopes.ForaminutetheRogue’s
dazedconsciousnessthatshewasreadingtheconfessionofhisvillainyblinded
himthenheforcedhimselftoreadthehastilyscrawledlines.
“Myhusband,IamleavingyoubecauseIamunworthyofyou.Iamawicked
woman.Ihavedeceivedyou.Ihavemisusedyourchivalryandgoodness.Ihave
takenadvantageofyourmisfortune,IamnotTheodoradeMelvilleIneverwas.
MynamemymaidennamewasTheodoraSaunders.Mypeoplearepoor,but,
incredibleasitmayseem,honourable.Twoyearsago,tohelpthem,Ibecame
theCountessdeMelville’scompanionandafterwardsherintimatefriend.With
herIlearnttospeakFrenchsufficientlywelltodeceiveyouthankstoour
arrangementtospeakEnglishinEnglandmyknowledgewasneverputseverely
tothetestanditwasIwhofledwithherwhenshecametoEnglandtomarry
you.Wewaitedforyouattheappointedmeetingplacebutyounevercame.We
knewnothingoftheshipwreckandtheCountessbelievedthatshehadbeen
betrayed.Shedarednotreturntoherpeopleanddecidedtotakerefugewitha
richauntinAmerica.Beforesheleftshegavemeallyourlettersandpresents
andbademefindyououtandgivethembacktoyou.IdidsoassoonasIheard
whereyouwere.NaturallyIheardalsothatyouhadlostyourmemory.About
thattimemyfamilywasindesperatestraits.Mybrother,Cecil,whomyoumet,
hadmadedebtsofhonourwhichhecouldnotmeetanddarednotconfesstohis
father.ItwashewhosuggestedtomethatIshouldplaythepartoftheCountess
Theodora.OurChristiannameswerethesameandIhadyourletterstohelpme.

LouisallthesameIdidnotmeantogothroughwithitbutthetrickwasso
horribly,painfullysuccessful.Iwasdrivenonandon.Cecilpointedouttome
thatevenifIwasfoundoutitwouldn’tbesobad.Icouldhaveconcealedmy
ownidentityandmyfatherandmotherwouldhavebeensparedthedisgraceofa
dishonouredson.Youseeitwasachoicebetweenthesonandthedaughterandit
isalwaysbetterforthedaughtertogounder,isn’tit?Ofcoursemypeopleknew
nothingtheybelieveIamstillearningmybreadhonourably.Cecilhelpedmeto
deceivethem,butnowthatheisonhiswaytoSouthAfricathereisnoreason


whyIshouldgoonwiththecruelfarce.Furtherdeceitisuselessanddiscovery
imminent.InanycaseIcouldnothaveborneitanylonger.Ihaveacted
wickedly,shamelessly,criminally,butIhavesuffered!Oh,Ihavesuffered
terribly.WhenIthinkofthatdreadfulwomanthatMrs.Pagot-Chump!Ofcourse
youhadnoreasontocareformeIhaddeceivedyouandyourinstinctknewit
butithurtallthesame.Andnowcomestheworstpartofmypunishment:Imust
leaveyouandyoumustknowwhoIreallyam.Icanhardlybearit.Oh,Louis,
Fatehasplayedmesuchacrueltrick!ShehasmademecareforthemanIhave
treatedsobadlyshehasmademelovehim.Oh,Louis,ifyouonlyknewhow
miserableIhavebeenyouwouldforgiveasIhopeyouwillforget
“Yourlovingandunhappy
“Theodora.”
WilliamBrownlookedup.Hiswifelookedupatthesamemoment.
Simultaneouslytheybrokeoutintoanhystericalpealoflaughter.
“Louisyouhumbug!”
“Theodoramydarlingadventuress!”
“Thenyou’renottheCount?”
“No—you’resureyou’renottheCountess?”
“Positive!”
“ThankHeaven!”

Hecaughtherinawildjoyfulembraceandforafulltwominutesdetectives,
pursuingpolicemenanddeeplyinjuredFrenchnoblemenwereforgottenina
tumultofhappiness.ThenWilliamBrowngentlyreleasedhimself.
“Youdon’tknowwhatI’vedone,Theodora,”hesaid.“I’verobbedandforged
perhapsmurdered.It’saliferatleastifIgetcaught.”
“Idon’tcare—I’llwaitforyou—I’llhangwithyou—I’llstandbyyouwhatever
happens—whateveryou’vedone!”


“Theodora—angel!”
“Mydear,dearRogue!”
ItwasatthatpreciseandbeautifulmomentthattheExpresswentofftherails.
Theaccidenthasalwaysbeenoneofthemysteriesofthatparticularlineforthe
trainwasnottravellingatagreatspeed.Theshockwasneverthelesssufficientto
separatethenewlyunitedcoupleandsendtheRogueflyingacrossthe
compartment,wherethebackofhisheadencounteredthedoorhandle.Hewas
brieflyawareofamagnificentdisplayofcelestialfireworksandofsomebody
callingtohimfromalongwayofftheneverythingrolledawayintovelvety
darknessandpeacefulsilence.
WhenthevelvetydarknessbegantothintheRoguemadenoattempttohasten
theprocess.Hewasfeelingverycomfortable,veryhappy,entirelydisinclinedto
exerthimself.Hewasvaguelyawarethatachangehadcomeoverhimbutwhat
thechangewashecouldnotbebotheredtothinkand,whenheopenedhiseyes
atlast,thesightofhishotelbed-roomandawhite-hairedmanseatedbesidehim
causedhimnoparticularsurprise.
“Hullo,dad!”hesaidsimplyandcheerfully.Theminutehehadspokenhowever,
heknewthatsomethingwonderfulhadhappenedthatthevaguelyfeltchange
hadbecomedefinite.Hesatupwithhishandtohisbandagedheadandstared
abouthim.“Why,what’shappened?”heasked.
Theoldgentlemanlaidasoothingaffectionatehandonhisshoulder.

“Mydearboyyou’verecoveredyourmemorythat’sall,”hesaid.“Youknow
whoIam,don’tyou?”
“Ofcourse—you’remyfather.”
“Andyouknowwhoyouare?”
“WhyRogerLancasterofcourse!”
Dr.Frohlocken,whohadbeenstandingconcealedbehindthecurtainsofthe
window,appearedatthismoment,likeanunusuallookingDeusexmachina.
“Maythisbealessontoyouall,”hesaidseverely.“ButmorethananyoneI


blamethatidiot—thatInspector.Didn’tIprotest?Didn’tItellhim?
Circumstantialevidence!Nonsense!Rubbish!Utterlyunscientific.Andyou
yourself,No.7ledastraybyaridiculouspig!However,letthatpass.Doyou
rememberhowyoucametoLondon?”
“Icametostudy.”
“Right!YouobserveMr.Lancaster—youwillnoteacompleterecovery.You
rememberhowyoucametoloseconsciousness.”
“IbelieveIwasattackedbysomeone.”
“Probably—andafterwardswhenyoucameround—doyourememberthat?”
Thepatientstaredathisfatherinsuddenwhite-facedconsternation.
“Whyyes,Ido!”hegasped.“Goodheavens—whatanawfulkettleoffish!What
shallIdo,sir?GetmeoutofEnglandbeforethatCountandMrs.Pagot-Chump
catchme,orthere’llbemurder.”
Mr.Lancasterchuckled.
“Don’tworry,mydearboy.Everythinghasbeenexplained.Thankstoan—er—
slightscientificmiscalculationtheCountdeBeaulieuwasarrestedyesterdayon
achargeoffraudulentmisrepresentation,butIgothimoutthismorningandhe
hasacceptedapologies,explanationsandcompensations.TheCountessisatthe
presentmomentinthenextroom,renewingherfriendshipandexchangingnotes
withyourwife.”Hepausedandwatchedhissonnarrowly.“Itappearsthatthe

CountmadehisescapefromthehospitalinordertofollowtheCountesswhen
heheardthatshehadgonetoAmerica.HeovertookherinNewYorkandafter
variousexplanationsandreconciliationstheyweremarriedoutthere.AstoMrs.
Pagot-Chumpwell,sheassuresmethatthepleasureofmakingyour
acquaintanceatonesforanyunpleasantness.Soyousee,all’swellthatends
well.”
RogerLancastershookhishead.
“It’sallamostgloriousconfusion,”hesaid.“Howdidyoufindmeout,sir?”
“WhenImissedyouItravelledalloverEuropeafteryou,”theelderman


answered.“FortunatelyIobtainedtheservicesofthisgentlemanhere.”He
indicatedthesmallneatlyattiredindividualwhowasleaningnegligentlyagainst
themantelpiece.“Ithinkyouhavemetbefore.”
“WashingtonJones,PrivateDetective,atyourservice,”thelittlemansaidwith
aneasybow.“Pleasedtowelcomeyoubacktoyourrightmind,sir.ThoughtI
knewyouwhenwemetinHerbertStreet,butcouldn’tbesuretillIgotyour
fatheronthespot.Oneofmybestjobs,sir.”
“I’msurewe’reverygrateful,”Rogeranswered.Heglanceduneasilyatthedoor.
“IsaythoughwhataboutGeorgeandthat—thatPig?”
Mr.WashingtonJones’facecreaseditselfintoinnumerablefoldsoflaughter,
thoughhemadenosound.
“GeorgeandtheLuckyPighavedisappearedandIdon’tsupposeweshallsee
eitherof‘emagain,”hesaid.“Thisletter,addressedtotheCountdeBeaulieu’s
locumtenens,arrivedattheBunmouthHotelthismorning.Iventuredtoopenit
andhereitis.IfyoupermitmetoreadittoyouIguessyouwon’tneedmuch
moreexplaining.”Hetookoutadirtysheetofpaperfromhispocketandcleared
histhroat.
“Dearoldbird,”hereadout.“YouarenotSlipperyBillyou’remerelyaSilly
Duffer.WhatelseyouarebesidesthisIreallydon’tknowexceptthatyou’rethe

fellowIdroppedonthateveningDr.Frohlockenmissedhissilver.Ichanged
clotheswithyouwhilstyouweredozingonthedoorstepIfearIhaverathera
heavyhandandthatishowyoucametohavemyLuckyPig,whichanimal,by
theway,Iventuredtonipoffyourwatch-chainatparting.InexchangeI
intendedtoreturnthegoldwatchIacceptedfromyouatourfirstmeetingbut
reallywewereratherpressedfortime,werewenot,andIamsureyouwillnot
grudgemethelittlesouvenir.PleasegivemyrespectstoDr.Frohlockenandtell
himhissilverwasreallyverymuchover-estimatedandquitebeneathmynotice.
AlsosuggesttoMonsieurBonnetthatheforgiveSusanassoonasherecovers
histemper.Sheisquiteanicelittlethingandshouldmakeanexcellentcook,if
herhandsareanythinglikeaslightasherbrains.Andnow,good-bye!Youwere
notmuchgoodinmyprofession,butyoumadeanexcellentCount,andIhave
nottheslightestdoubtthatyouarereallysomethinghighlyrespectable.Inany
caseIshallalwaysbearyouinaffectionateremembranceasawellintentioned
understudyandpartner.


“Yoursfaithfully,
“WilliamBrown,aliasSlipperyBill.”
“P.S.GivemylovetothepoliceandtellthemthatNo.10,HerbertStreetisto
letunfurnished.”
“Well,uponmyword,Ihopetheydon’tcatchhim!”thelateWilliamBrown
declareddelightedly.
“Andyoucanstakeyourbottomdollarthattheywon’t,”saidMr.Washington
Jones,“unlesshelandsintheStates,ofcourse,inwhichcase—”
ButtheyoungerLancasterwasnotlistening.Atthatmomentthedoorhad
openedandheheldouthishandsingladrecognition.
“Theodora!”hesaid.
Shecametowardshimbravelyandalittledefiantly.
“Idon’tknow,nowthatyouhaverecoveredyourmemory,ifyouwanttoseeme

again,”shesaid.
“Iwanttoseeandkeepyoualways.”
“Youaresure?RememberwhoIamandwhatIhavedone!”
“AmanwhohasrejoicedinthenameofSlipperyBillandtriedtorobhisown
fatherisscarcelyinthepositiontothrowstones,”observedtheelderLancaster
grimly.
“Infact,sincewe’rerathershadycharacters,”hissonsuggested,“wehavejust
gottojoinforces,mywife!”
“Rogues&Company!”suggestedDr.Frohlockenpleasantly.Butasthetwo
chiefmembersofhisaudiencewerefartooabsorbedineachothertonoticehim
thislaststrokeofgeniuspassedwithoutrecognition.
THEEND