How To Stop Worrying And Start Living 21 potx

“How To Stop Worrying And Start Living” By Dale Carnegie
181

Worry had completely defeated me. My mind was so confused and troubled that I could
see no joy in living. My nerves were so strained that I could neither sleep at night nor
relax by day. My three young children were widely separated, living with relatives. My
husband, having recently returned from the armed service, was in another city trying to
establish a law practice. I felt all the insecurities and uncertainties of the postwar
readjustment period.

I was threatening my husband's career, my children's natural endowment of a happy,
normal home life, and I was also threatening my own life. My husband could find no
housing, and the only solution was to build. Everything depended on my getting well.
The more I realised this and the harder I would try, the greater would be my fear of
failure. Then I developed a fear of planning for any responsibility. I felt that I could no
longer trust myself. I felt I was a complete failure.

When all was darkest and there seemed to be no help, my mother did something for me
that I shall never forget or cease being grateful for. She shocked me into fighting back.
She upbraided me for giving in and for losing control of my nerves and my mind. She
challenged me to get up out of bed and fight for all I had. She said I was giving in to the
situation, fearing it instead of facing it, running away from life instead of living it.

So I did start fighting from that day on. That very weekend I told my parents they could
go home, because I was going to take over; and I did what seemed impossible at the
time. I was left alone to care for my two younger children. I slept well, I began to eat
better, and my spirits began to improve. A week later when they returned to visit me
again, they found me singing at my ironing. I had a sense of well-being because I had
begun to fight a battle and I was winning. I shall never forget this lesson. If a situation
seems insurmountable, face it! Start fighting! Don't give in!

From that time on I forced myself to work, and lost myself in my work. Finally I gathered
my children together and joined my husband in our new home. I resolved that I would
become well enough to give my lovely family a strong, happy mother. I became
engrossed with plans for our home, plans for my children, plans for my husband, plans
for everything-except for me. I became too busy to think of myself. And it was then that
the real miracle happened.

I grew stronger and stronger and could wake up with the joy of well-being, the joy of
planning for the new day ahead, the joy of living. And although days of depression did
creep in occasionally after that, especially when I was tired, I would tell myself not to
think or try to reason with myself on those days-and gradually they became fewer and
fewer and finally disappeared.

Now, a year later, I have a very happy, successful husband, a beautiful home that I can
work in sixteen hours a day, and three healthy, happy children-and for myself, peace of
mind!

~~~~

Setbacks (*)
By
Ferenc Molnar

Noted Hungarian Playwright "Work is the best narcotic!"

“How To Stop Worrying And Start Living” By Dale Carnegie
182
Exactly fifty years ago my father gave me the words I have lived by ever since. He was
a physician. I had just started to study law at the Budapest University. I failed one
examination. I thought I could not survive the shame so I sought escape in the

consolation of failure's closest friend, alcohol, always at hand: apricot brandy to be
exact.

My father called on me unexpectedly. Like a good doctor, he discovered both the trouble
and the bottle, in a second. I confessed why I had to escape reality.

The dear old man then and there improvised a prescription. He explained to me that
there can be no real escape in alcohol or sleeping pills-or in any drug. For any sorrow
there is only one medicine, better and more reliable than all the drugs in the world: work!

How right my father was! Getting used to work might be hard. Sooner or later you
succeed. It has, of course, the quality of all the narcotics. It becomes habit-forming. And
once the habit is formed, sooner or later, it becomes impossible to break one's self of it.
I have never been able to break myself of the habit for fifty years.



[*] Reprinted with permission of the author, from Words to Live By-A Little Treasury of
Inspiration and Wisdom, published by Simon and Schuster, Inc., copyright, 1947, by
William Nichols.



I Was So Worried I Didn't Eat A Bite Of Solid Food For Eighteen Days
By
Kathryne Holcombe Farmer

Sheriff's Office, Mobile, Alabama

Three months ago, I was so worried that I didn't sleep for four days and nights; and I did

not eat a bite of solid food for eighteen days. Even the smell of food made me violently
sick. I cannot find words to describe the mental anguish I endured. I wonder whether
hell has any worse tortures than what I went through. I felt as if I would go insane or die.
I knew that I couldn't possibly continue living as I was.

The turning point of my life was the day I was given an advance copy of this book.
During the last three months, I have practically lived with this book, studying every page,
desperately trying to find a new way of life. The change that has occurred in my mental
outlook and emotional stability is almost unbelievable. I am now able to endure the
battles of each passing day. I now realise that in the past, I was being driven half mad
not by today's problems but by the bitterness and anxiety over something that had
happened yesterday or that I feared might happen tomorrow.

But now, when I find myself starting to worry about anything, I immediately stop and
start to apply some of the principles I learned from studying this book. If I am tempted to
tense up over something that must be done today, I get busy and do it immediately and
get it off my mind.

When I am faced with the kind of problems that used to drive me half crazy, I now
calmly set about trying to apply the three steps outlined in Chapter 2, Part One. First, I
ask myself what is the worst that can possibly happen. Second, I try to accept it
“How To Stop Worrying And Start Living” By Dale Carnegie
183
mentally. Third, I concentrate on the problem and see how I can improve the worst
which I am already willing to accept- if I have to.

When I find myself worrying about a thing I cannot change -and do not want to accept-I
stop myself short and repeat this little prayer:

"God grant me the serenity

to accept the things I cannot change,
the courage to change the things I can,
and wisdom to know the difference."

Since reading this book, I am really experiencing a new and glorious way of life. I am no
longer destroying my health and happiness by anxiety. I can sleep nine hours a night
now. I enjoy my food. A veil has been lifted from me. A door has been opened. I can
now see and enjoy the beauty of the world which surrounds me. I thank God for life now
and for the privilege of living in such a wonderful world.

May I suggest that you also read this book over: keep it by your bed: underscore the
parts that apply to your problems. Study it; use it. For this is not a "reading book" in the
ordinary sense; it is written as a "guidebook"-to a new way of life!



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