Mistakes in writing complaints and orders letters of purchasing department of northern green land service and real estate joint stock company

ABSTRACT
Research topic: "Mistakes in writing complaints and orders letters of
Purchasing Department of Northern Green Land Service and Real Estate Joint
Stock Company" are both meaningful and necessary in theory and practice when
writing business correspondence with foreign partner by English.
This study codified theoretical issues related to business correspondence in
English, especially complaint letters and order letters, the cause of mistakes when
writing these two types of business correspondence of purchasing staff member of
the company. The study also analyzed, found difficulties in writing letters of
complaint and letters in English that employees of the Purchasing Department faced
based on their reasons and actual expression through the use of Data collection
methods - survey questionnaires for all procurement department employees and
based on 30 complaint letters and order letters.
From the above difficulties, the study has provided some useful solutions to
help the Purchasing Department staff improve the skills of writing complaint letters
and order letters by English.
Due to limited time, awareness and practical experience, research cannot avoid
errors and errors. Therefore, I look forward to receiving comments and suggestions
to improve the research

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ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
In the process of completing the thesis, I received enthusiastic help from
supervisors, teachers of the English Department - Thuongmai University, my family
and especially the staff of Purchasing Department of Northern Green Land Service
and Real Estate Joint Stock Company
First of all, I would like to express my deep gratitude to my beloved
supervisor- Vu Thi Thu Trang, who directly leads me. Thanks for her helpful advice
and detailed comments in the preparation as well as editing. Besides, she always

supports and creates favorable conditions for me to complete this graduation article.
Secondly, I would like to express my sincere thanks to the Purchasing
Manager of Northern Green Land Service and Real Estate Joint Stock CompanyMs. Nguyen Thi Quynh, who helped and guided me very enthusiastically during the
internship and work. I also give special thanks to all the staff of the purchasing
department, especially contributing their ideas and experiences to help me enrich
my graduation.
Finally, I want to express my deepest appreciation to my family and friends,
especially my parents who always take care of me and bring me to complete my
thesis.
Hanoi, April 18, 2019
Student
Bui Thi Phuong Trinh

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TABLE OF CONTENT
ABSTRACT..............................................................................................................i
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS....................................................................................ii
TABLE OF CONTENT.........................................................................................iii
LIST OF TABLES AND CHARTS.........................................................................v
CHAPTER 1: OVERVIEW OF STUDY...............................................................1
1.1 Rationale............................................................................................................1
1.2 Previous study....................................................................................................1
1.3 Aims to the study...............................................................................................3
1.4 Research subject................................................................................................3
1.5 Scope of the study..............................................................................................4
1.6 Research methodology.......................................................................................4
1.7 Organization of the study..................................................................................5
CHAPTER 2: LITERATURE REVIEW...............................................................6

2.1 Overview of business correspondence..............................................................6
2.1.1 Business correspondence.................................................................................6
2.1.2 Importance of Business Correspondence........................................................6
2.1.3 Types of business correspondence...................................................................7
2.2 Overview of business letter...............................................................................8
2.2.1 Business letter..................................................................................................8
2.2.2 Importance of business letter...........................................................................9
2.2.3 Function of business letter............................................................................10
2.2.4 Parts of business letter...................................................................................12
2.2.5 Types of Business letter.................................................................................14
2.2.6 When to write which type of Business letter..................................................15
2.3 Overview of order letter..................................................................................17
2.3.1 Order letter.....................................................................................................17
2.3.2 Factors to be considered while drafting order letter....................................17
2.4 Overview of complaint letter..........................................................................18
2.4.1 Complaint letter.............................................................................................18
2.4.2 Types of Complaint Letters............................................................................19
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2.4.3 Factors to be considered while drafting complaint letter..............................20
2.5 Mistakes in writing business letter.................................................................21
2.5.1: Mistakes analysis..........................................................................................21
2.5.2 Common mistakes in writing business letter.................................................21
CHAPTER 3: DATA ANALYSIS AND RESEARCH FINDINGS.....................24
3.1 Data analysis....................................................................................................24
3.1.1 Education level of purchasing department staffs..........................................24
3.1.2 Timeserving in purchasing department.........................................................25
3.1.3 How frequently do writing complaints and orders letter of purchasing
department?............................................................................................................26

3.1.4 Number of staffs feels confident in writing complaints and orders letters...27
3.1.5 Mistakes in writing complaints and orders letters........................................27
3.2: The main reasons for writing complaint and order letters..........................32
CHAPTER 4: RECOMMENDATIONS AND SUGGESTIONS........................34
4.1 Some solutions which the company can use to improve writing complaint
and order letters skill of Purchasing Department Staff......................................34
4.2 Some solutions which the staff can use to improve writing complaint and
order letters skill of them......................................................................................35
4.3 Some suggestion for the school where students are trained before they
become employees..................................................................................................37
CONCLUSION
REFERENCES
APPENDIX

LIST OF TABLES AND CHARTS
Table 1: Sample of Error Log (adapted from Ferris and Hedgcock, 2005)................4
Table 2: Recapitulation of Errors...............................................................................5
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Chart 1: Education level of purchasing department staffs........................................24
Chart 2: Timeserving in purchasing department......................................................25
Chart 3: How frequently do writing complaints and orders letters of purchasing
department?.............................................................................................................26
Chart 4: Number of staffs feels confident in writing complaints and orders letters. 27
Table 3: The results of the survey results in mistakes..............................................28
Table 4: The results of the recapitulation of mistake...............................................32

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CHAPTER 1: OVERVIEW OF STUDY
1.1 Rationale
After nearly 30 years of renovation, Vietnam has achieved important
achievements. From an outdated agricultural economy with 90% of the population
working in agriculture, up to now, the material and technical foundations and socioeconomic infrastructure have been gradually met to meet the industrialization,
modernize (industrialization and modernization) and transfer all activities of selfsufficient agricultural economy to an industrialized economy. Vietnam's economy
has gradually integrated into the regional and world economy. The achievements of
the process of industrialization and modernization bring the country to develop and
improve the material and spiritual life of the people and contribute to ensuring
security and national defense.
Along with that strong development, Vietnam is also facing to some problems
in which trade integration is also a big challenge. Vietnam is a potential market with
an abundant labor force that is an ideal choice for foreign investors. Not only
communicative English, commercial English also has affirmed its importance not
only for tourism companies but also for other fields, especially real estate.
However, there are still mistakes in writing complaints and orders letter of
purchasing department of Northern Green Land Service and Real Estate Joint Stock
Company. English is most language that is used in the company. Most staff in
purchasing in company has English basically so in writing complaints and orders
letters is still weak.
In order to help the staffs, especially purchasing department improve writing
complaints and orders letters skill after one- month internship at purchasing
department of Northern Green Land Service and Real Estate Joint Stock Company, I
carry on this study with the title: “Mistakes in writing complaints and orders letter
of purchasing department of Northern Green Land Service and Real Estate Joint
Stock Company”
1.2 Previous study
There has been a lot of research related to writing business correspondence
such as “How to improve your business writing?” by Carolyn O’Hara; “How to

improve business writing?” by Jacob Funnell; “10 tips for effective business
writing”; “The 10 most important business skill you will need by 2020”… These
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studies all point to steps to write a business correspondence such as “How to
improve your business writing?” by Carolyn O’Hara:
“Principles to Remember:
Do:
Plan out what you will say to make your writing more direct and effective.
Use words sparingly and keep sentences short and to the point.
Avoid jargon and “fancy” words. Strive for clarity instead.
Don’t:
Argue that you simply can’t write. Anyone can become a better writer with
practice.
Pretend that your first draft is perfect, or even passable. Every document can
be improved.
Bury your argument. Present your main idea as soon as possible.”
There has been a lot of book to writing business correspondence such as:
“Writing for business”. The author reviewed: “This book has been written for
intermediate students of English who want to write business letters. It has been
specifically designed for students working for companies which have a need for
regular communication with overseas customers, agents, etc... Students who want to
use this book should have a basic knowledge of English grammar and a small
vocabulary. In fact it has been assumed that students are familiar with the first three
levels of the Cambridge English Lexicon (2207 words). Most words above this
level are listed in the glossary”. The book “Writing correspondence…E-mail…
Fax…by English” by Nguyen Thanh Yen also is an interesting book about business
correspondence.
All of these studies and books show ways to improve your business writing

skills very effectively. However, to improve the most effective commercial
correspondence skills, it is necessary to find difficulties in the writing process. In
business, writing business correspondence is very important in the business of the
company, it may even be related to the success or failure of a company transaction.
In reality, most people still have some difficulties when writing business
correspondence. That is the reason why we choose the thesis “Mistakes in writing
complaints and orders letter of Purchasing Department of Northern Green Land
Service and Real Estate Joint Stock Company”
1.3 Aims to the study
The aim of this study is to identify problems in writing complaints and orders

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letter and find out some solutions to improve writing complaints and orders letter of
Purchasing Department of Northern Green Land Service and Real Estate Joint
Stock Company. The expectation is the staff of purchasing department of Northern
Green Land Service and Real Estate Joint Stock Company can write complaints and
orders letter correctly to achieve high efficiently at work.
1.4 Research subject
Real Estate is highly competitive one, every company requires their staff know
English basically. Nowadays, foreigner transactions are becoming more and more
popular. Thus writing business correspondence must be clear and understandable.
To improve writing complaints and orders letter skill, staffs of Purchasing
Department need to understand the importance of writing business correspondence,
know how to write letters correctly. The finding of this study is beneficial for
Northern Green Land Service and Real Estate Joint Stock Company. These finding
can be used to help Northern Green Land Service and Real Estate Joint Stock
Company appreciate qualification of purchasing department.
Here are some questions to deal with the study

What is the reality of the use of English of all staff in Northern Green Land
Service and Real Estate Joint Stock Company, especially purchasing department?
What are mistakes in writing complaints and orders letter of purchasing
department of Northern Green Land Service and Real Estate Joint Stock Company?
How frequently do writing complaints and orders letter of purchasing
department?
What are some solutions or suggestions used to help them?
1.5 Scope of the study
This study focus improving writing complaints and orders letter skill of staff
of Northern Green Land Service and Real Estate Joint Stock Company. Moreover it
is big problem, requires much time and effort. Due to limited time, resources and
knowledge as well as other conditions, the study carried out to find out mistakes in
writing complaints and orders letter of purchasing department of Northern Green
Land Service and Real Estate Joint Stock Company to help them improve writing
complaints and orders letter skill to write complaints and orders letter correctly to
achieve high efficience at work. Thus, this study is valuable for the Purchasing
Department of Northern Green Land Service and Real Estate Joint Stock Company.
1.6 Research methodology
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Method of data collection from references is the method we choose in this
study. In order to collect data for this study, we follow through letter are sent and
received from email and fax in December 2018. There are 3 steps to conduct the
survey:
Step 1: the researcher identified the situation/reality of writing complaints and
orders letter of purchasing department
Step 2: the researcher data collection
In this step, we will collect 30 order and complaint letters of Purchasing
Department and fill in the table which based on Ferris and Hedgcock model (2005)

Data

Morphological

Lexica

Syntactic

Mechanical

Verb

Noun

Articl

l
Word

Sentence

Spellin

Punctuatio

Capitalizatio

Error

Error

e

Choice

Structure

g Error

n Error

n Error

Error

Error

Error

1
…
3
Table 1: Sample of Error Log (adapted from Ferris and Hedgcock, 2005)

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Step 3: The researcher analysis data collection
After the error patterns are identified, the total number of error is recapitulated
(in componential analysis). The recapitulation can be seen in the following table:

Error Type

Frequency of

Percentage (%)

Error
Morphologica
Lexical
Syntactic
Mechanical

Verb Error
Noun Error
Article Error
Word Choice Error
Sentence Structure
Error
Spelling Error
Punctuation Error
Capitalization
Error

Total
Table 2: Recapitulation of Errors
1.7 Organization of the study
This study is divided into 4 chapters as follow
Chapter 1: The Overview of the study which including rationale, previous
study, aims of the study, research subjects, scope of the study, research methodology
and organization of the study.

Chapter 2: Literature review looking at some theoretical background realiting
to the study. It focuses on concepts of complaints letters, orders letters, purchasing
department, mistakes
Chapter 3: Data analysis and research finding: provides the details of the
findings including survey results through data collection
Chapter 4: Recommendation and suggestion include summary of the study,
discussion and conclusion before ending with recommendation for further studies.

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CHAPTER 2: LITERATURE REVIEW
2.1 Overview of business correspondence
2.1.1 Business correspondence
“Communication through exchange of letters is known as correspondence. We
communicate our feelings, thoughts etc, to our friends and relatives through letters
that may be called personal correspondence. A businessman also writes and receives
letters in his day to-day transactions, which may be called business correspondence.
Business correspondence or business letters is a written communication
between two parties. Businessmen may write letters to supplier of goods and also
receive letters from the suppliers. Customers may write letters to businessmen
seeking information about availability of goods, price, quality, sample etc, or place
order for purchase of goods. Thus, business letters may be defined as a media or
means through which views are expressed and ideas or information is
communicated in writing in the process of business activities”- According the book
“Business correspondence” of translation and interpreting department of faculty of
English of Thuongmai University.
2.1.2 Importance of Business Correspondence
“A business correspondence has numbers of importance. Its most important
feature is the ease of reaching and communicating with different parties. It is not

always possible to meet persons face to face.
A business correspondence helps to meet some organizational goals. One can
achieve the objectives through it. Let us study some of them in details.
1. Maintaining a Proper Relationship
It is not always possible for any business or organization to reach to any
person in particular. This will cost any business. Here, the business correspondence
will be a rescue for any business.
It helps in maintaining the proper relationships between the parties. Business
correspondence strengthens the business. It also helps in the internal
communication. It makes communication within the organization more clear and
precise.
2. Serves as Evidence
Any written form of communication serves as evidence. A business
correspondence helps the person in a business to keep a record of all the facts.
These written records will serve as evidence.
3. Create and Maintain Goodwill
It helps in creating and maintaining goodwill between a business and a


customer. Any letter to enquire, complaint, suggestion or feedbacks helps a
company to grow and maintain goodwill.
4. Inexpensive and Convenient
It is a cheap and convenient form of business communication.
5. Formal Communication
A business communication serves as a formal communication between two
persons. It may be a seller and a buyer. It can be between an employee and the
employer. The language used is formal and logical.
It helps in removing the ambiguity and the doubts of the person involved in
the business. The formal communication in business is followed and acceptable.
6. Helps in the Expansion of Business

A business correspondence helps a business to achieve the set goal. It also
ensures the expansion of a business. With no waste of time and proper utilization of
manpower and resources, a business can expand.
Any information regarding some resources or any product or market can be
easily done. Even the news of the expansion of business can be spread by it” ”According the book “Business correspondence” of translation and interpreting
department of faculty of English of Thuongmai University.
2.1.3 Types of business correspondence
Business letters
Business letter is a type of letter with official communication between two
businesses about their business issues. In the past, business letters were often sent
by post office or courier, but today, for quick and convenient information, people
often exchange letters through computer networks. There are 5 types of business
letter. The different types of business letters used based on their context are as
follows,
Enquiries letter
Replies and quotations letter
Orders letter
Complaints and adjustments letter
Recovery letter
Official letters can be handwritten or printed. Modernisation has led to the
usage of new means of business correspondence such as E-mail and Fax
Email
Base on Computer Hope:
"Email Short for electronic mail, e-mail or email is information stored on a
computer that is exchanged between two users over telecommunications. More
plainly, e-mail is a message that may contain text, files, images, or other


attachments sent through a network to a specified individual or group of
individuals"

Email is the way businesses often use to exchange correspondence. It is the
latest, most modern form of business communication and is used when there is a
need to communicate to large audience in an organization.
Memorandum
“A memorandum, more commonly known as a memo, is a short message or
record used for internal communication in a business. Once the primary form of
internal written communication, memorandums have declined in use since the
introduction of email and other forms of electronic messaging; however, being able
to write clear memos certainly can serve you well in writing internal business
emails, as they often serve the same purpose” according Richard Nordquist .
2.2 Overview of business letter
2.2.1 Business letter
In the book “Business letter writing: Your Question and Answers”, Josy
Roberts wrote:
“A business letter is a formal communication between people or organizations
who are involved in trading- exchanging money for goods or services.
Writing business letter is about developing that trade, so it is important to
remember that a business letter is an official document. Of course there are many
other communications between people and companies, for instance telephone
conversation, email, meetings, presentations, contracts, orders and invoices. A
business letter is the most powerful communication tool for providing structured
and considered information in a formal way”
2.2.2 Importance of business letter
According to The Business Communication 1 Comment:
“Letter is as an indispensable tool of communication in business. Business
letters are used to sell the products, make inquiry about customers or prices of
goods, seek information and advice, maintain good public relation, increase
goodwill and perform a variety of other business functions. With the continuous
growth of commerce and industry, usefulness and importance of business letter are
also increasing gradually. Some points highlighting the benefits or importance of

business letter are discussed below:
 Exchanging business information: Letters are the most economic and
convenient means of exchanging information. With the help of letters, executives


can easily exchange information with customers, suppliers, investors, government
offices; regulatory authorities etc.
 Establishing business relationship: Business letter play important role in
establishing and maintaining relationship with various parties. Business letters
reduce the distance between a business and its customers, suppliers, creditors and
other public groups.
 Creation of markets: Circular letter a form of business letter, helps to create
new markets for goods and services. This letter contains information about utility,
features and usefulness of the products and induces the customer to buy the
products.
 Substitute to personal visit: Introduction of letters in business world relieves
the business executives’ form visiting their clients, suppliers, creditors and other
public groups by traveling a long distance. For this reason, commercial letters are
called alternative technique to personal visit.
 Saving cost and time: Business letters relieve the busy executives from
visiting personally their clients and other concerned parties. Therefore, valuable
time and costs can be saved.
 Maintaining secrecy: Business letters also help to maintain secrecy of
information. Non one other than the sender and receiver can know the message
contained in the letter.
 Increasing goodwill: Business letters, like inquiry letter, circular letter, order
acknowledgement letter, adjustment grant letter etc help to increase good will of a
business with the customers.
 Formal agreement: Business letter acts as formal agreement between buyer
and seller. For example an order letter contains name of items, price, and quantity,

time of delivery and mode of payment. All these are regarded as the conditions of
agreement between buyer and seller.
 Settlement of transaction: Commercial letters have paramount importance in
setting business transaction. For example, by writing claim letter, buyer can raise
his claims to the seller by writing collection letters; seller can collect dues from the
customers.
 Use as reference: Information exchanged through letters can be preserved
permanently and used as reference when need arise. Therefore, making business
decisions becomes easier.


 Legal acceptance: Business letter is an acceptable document in the eye of
law. It can be stored and produced as a documentary proof.
 Assistance in local and international trade: Bothe local and foreign trade
essentially requires the help of various business letters. Through letters,
businessperson make inquiry about products and prices place orders for goods
collect the dues make and settle claims etc.
From the above discussion, it can be concluded that successful operation of
business activities establishing, maintaining and developing business relationship
and finally achieving business goal all require help of business letters. In a sense,
conducting business is impossible without business letters.”
2.2.3 Function of business letter
In business communication wrote:
“Business letters secure, promote and maintain

business

without

complications, Business letters serve us a reference for the future. Every

organization should have to classify its outgoing mail and incoming mail and file
them classified on the basis of their subject matter in a chronological sequence.
Business letters serve to maintain the correct information of the organization in the
perception of the receiver. Business letters establish and maintain contacts over a
wide area truly enlarging the scope and extent of business. Business letters can be
used as legal documents in disputes. All business letters promote goodwill and
enhance the prestige and the image of the organization.
We can enumerate the functions of a business letter thus :
Promotional Functions
Business organisations have to grow and enlarge, improving the quality of
their products, by producing new products and providing better services. The
customers have to be kept informed through letters these developments. Business
organisations have to expand their market by tapping new areas. All round
expansion is possible only if the organisation keeps all the people concerned well
informed through letters that promote sales and service.
Informational Functions
Business letters provide valuable data about earlier policies, transactions and
all other activities of the organisation. Modern business cannot depend on memory
as in olden days. Letters are ready references if they are available. New policies can
be evolved by studying the earlier ones. It is not only essential to maintain good
correspondence but also more essential to make them be available in the files.


Legal Functions
Business letters can provide evidence in legal disputes, if any, that occur in a
transaction. They are useful as legal documents in quotations and offers.
Goodwill Functions
Business letters promote goodwill among parties transacting business. They
build a good rapport between parties in a business transaction.
All these functions of a business letter promote sales and improve the image of

the firm. So, every business letter is a sales letter if it serves the stated or implied
objectives.”
2.2.4 Parts of business letter
A business letter is more formal than a personal letter. It should have a margin
of at least one inch on all four edges. It is always written on 8½"x11" (or metric
equivalent) unlined stationery. There are 12 parts to a business letter.
The Heading
This contains the return address (usually two or three lines) with the date on
the last line. Sometimes it may be necessary to include a line after the address and
before the date for a phone number, fax number, E-mail address, or something
similar. Often a line is skipped between the address and date. That should always be
done if the heading is next to the left margin. It is not necessary to type the return
address if you are using stationery with the return address already imprinted.
Always include the date.
Date
The date is normally written on the right hand side corner after the heading as
the day, month and years
Reference
It indicates letter number and the department from where the letter is being
snet and the year. Its helps in future reference. This reference number is given on
the left hand corner after the heading.
The Inside Address
This is the address you are sending your letter to. Make it as complete as
possible. Include titles and names if you know them. This is always on the left
margin. If an 8½" x 11" paper is folded in thirds to fit in a standard 9" business
envelope, the inside address can appear through the window in the envelope. An
inside address also helps the recipient route the letter properly and can help should
the envelope be damaged and the address become unreadable. Skip a line after the
heading before the inside address. Skip another line after the inside address before