Confused Connections

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Confused Connections
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HAPTER
6
Confused Connections
151
In this chapter we’ll look at words we use to link parts of
sentences together, words such as “and” and “because.”
They’re called connectors or conjunctions in the grammar
trade, and most of them aren’t too hard to handle. You can use
connectors such as “and” and “or” to establish a simple link,
such as, I cleaned out the bathroom and threw out the trash
this afternoon. Here “and” is just a time-saver: It allows you
to list everything you did this afternoon without having to stop
and say two different sentences. But other connectors such as
“because” and “therefore” have a more exciting job: They make
a logical link between two thoughts: I deserve an extra slice
of pie because I cleaned out the bathroom and threw out
the trash this afternoon. Here the connector lets people know
you’re about to give a reason for what you’re doing (not nec-
essarily a good reason, but that’s not the connector’s fault).
Most connectors are cooperative little words that work hard
in their sentences and don’t make trouble. But two kinds of
connectors can sometimes get confusing: two-part connectors
we call “bookend expressions,” and imprecise connectors that
just don’t get the right idea across. Let’s take them one at a
time.
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Bookend Expressions
This section could properly be called “Problems With Cor-
relative Conjunctions,” but then you might have skipped it out
of terror, and it’s not really that tricky. Correlative conjunctions
are simply pairs of words that join together other phrases. For
example, the sentence Either you take your feet off the table
or I’ll take them off for you features a famous pair, “either/
or.” The difficulties people have with these connectors tend to
be of two types. Type one: leaving out the second half of the
conjunction. Type two: choosing a second half that is not the
proper mate for the first half. Thinking of correlative conjunc-
tions as bookends is helpful because these expressions, prop-
erly paired, give a kind of order and structure to the string of
words in a sentence. And if you leave one off, or try to partner
a bookend with something weaker than its true mate, things get
sloppy fast, and before you know it, you have a spill. The fol-
lowing sections contain the most common errors made with
bookend expressions.
63. Not only...But/But also
Don’t Say: He is not only too big for the kiddie pool, he is
too scary in that snorkeling gear.
Say Instead: He is not only too big for the kiddie pool, but
also too scary in that snorkeling gear.
Here’s Why:
Whenever you use “not only” to introduce
one part of a two-part idea, you need to complete the thought
by introducing the second part with “but” or “but also.” Simple.
Here are more correct examples of this pair of bookends in
action:
Jane is not only brilliant, but charming.

Not only will I dock your pay, but I will also put you on
notice.
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They not only showed up uninvited, but also brought
cheap wine.
His answer revealed
not only his love for the game,
but also his commitment to this losing team.
64. On the one hand...On the other hand
Don’t Say: On the one hand, Mitch is good looking, but
then he’s never much fun to talk to.
Say Instead: On the one hand, Mitch is good looking, but
on the other hand, he’s never much fun to talk to.
Here’s Why:

You need both “hands” to be organized and
tidy in sentences such as these. The whole idea is to compare
two opposite points, as we’re trying to do here with the attrac-
tive, but boring, Mitch. So the minute you hear on the one
hand coming out of your mouth, get ready to introduce the flip
side with on the other hand. You can drop the second “hand,”
and say on the one hand...on the other, but you don’t get to
substitute entirely new phrases such as “but then” or “only
then” or “except that.” A few more correct examples are:
She is, on the one hand, a stunning performer, and,
on the other hand, a terror to deal with backstage.
On the one hand, we could go to your mother’s, but
on the other, we could just invite her here.

You could see that,
on the one hand, they wanted to
get married, but, on the other hand, they were
petrified.
One final note on this expression: You can only use it to
compare two things, because you only have two hands! So
unless you belong to an alien race of three-handed Martians,
don’t say On the one hand, we could go to the beach; on
the other hand, we could go to the mall; on the other hand,
we could just stay home and play canasta. Instead, sort out
your alternatives so you’re only using two hands: On the one
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hand, we could go to the beach or the mall, but on the
other hand, we could just stay home and play canasta.
65. Either...Or
Don’t Say: You either answer my question or else go to
your room.
Say Instead: You either answer my question or go to your
room.
Here’s Why:
Most people remember to follow “either”
with “or,” but sometimes we throw in other words that add
nothing and just muck up the sentence. So avoid “or else” and
“or maybe” and such phrases when you’re using “either/or.”
66. Neither...Nor
Don’t Say: He’s not going to school or working, neither.
Say Instead: He’s neither going to school nor working.
Here’s Why:

You never get to have a “neither” without a
“nor” when your intention is to compare two things, as it is in
this sentence. You can use “neither” as a pronoun, as in He
invited neither of them. But if you were to revise that sen-
tence to use “neither” as a conjunction, you’d need “nor” as
follows: He invited neither John nor Sarah.
67. As...As
Don’t Say: As surely that this is payday, she’ll be at the
racetrack.
Say Instead: As surely as this is payday, she’ll be at the
racetrack.
Here’s Why:
When you use “as” to begin this type of
comparison, you need another “as” to follow up, not another
word such as “that.” Here are some more examples:
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As guilty as he looks, he’ll surely be convicted.
She did
as poorly on the test as Mary.
She looked surprisingly calm,
as harrowing as the trek
had been.
68. The reason...Was that
Don’t Say: The reason Jay survived was because he had
packed a case of chocolate bars for the journey.
Say Instead: The reason Jay survived was that he had
packed a case of chocolate bars for the journey.
Here’s Why:

Once you say, “the reason,” you’ve told your
listeners that you’re talking about a cause-and-effect relation-
ship between two things. All that’s left for you is to say that the
reason was this or that. Saying the reason was because is
redundant—“because” is just another way of saying, “the rea-
son.” Additional correct examples that illustrate the difference
between constructions with “the reason” and “because”:
The reason Emily came dressed as Helen of Troy was
that she’d been told it was a costume party.
Emily came as Helen of Troy
because she’d been told
it was a costume party.
Mulligan said
the reason he is serving is that the head
waiter is sick.
Mulligan is serving
because the head waiter is sick.
Test: Bookend Expressions
Please use not only/but, also to link the following
sentences.
1. Her date is boring. Her date is ugly.
2. I will give you unconditional love. I will do your laundry.
3. Stanley hated the party because the guests were all too
rowdy. He spilled Tabasco sauce on his favorite tie.
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