Forming comparisions 1 pdf

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Chapter 18: Practicing Parallel Structure
19. You may not know that the first example of this single-celled organism would have the
name Amy.
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20. When you split them in half, the new organisms name themselves.
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21. The right half of Amy was still called Amy by herself, but the left half now called
herself Bea.
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22. The next time Amy and Bea split, you have four new organisms.
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23. No one can imagine a conference between four single-celled organisms unless they wit-
nessed it.
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24. Amy Right Half favored a name that people will notice.
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25. Amy Left Half thought about the choice for so long that her swimming was neglected.
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26. Bea Right Half, a proto-feminist, opted for “Amy-Bea,” because she wants to honor both
her parents.
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27. Everyone always pronounced “Amy-Bea” very fast, and soon “Amoeba” was their pre-

ferred spelling.
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28. Single-celled organisms should have simple names that can be remembered by biology
students.
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29. Bea Left Half, by the way, will change her name to Amy-Bea when she reached the age of
seventeen days.
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30. You know what a teenager is like; they always have to assert their identities.
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Matchmaking 101: Either/Or, Not
Only/But Also, and Similar Pairs
Like dating couples, some words that join ideas (conjunctions, in grammar-speak)
arrive in pairs. Specifically, either/or, neither/nor, not only/but also, and both/and work
as teams. Also like daters, these conjunction pairs tend to drift apart. Your job is to
keep them together by ensuring that they link parallel elements. All you have to do is
check that the elements being linked by these words have the same grammatical iden-
tity (two nouns, two noun-verb combos, two adjectives, or two whatevers). Check out
the following examples, in which the linked elements are underlined and the conjunc-
tions are italicized:
Nonparallel: Gertrude was not only anxious
to achieve fame but also she wanted
to make a lot of money.
Parallel: Either by going to the moon
or by swimming across the Pacific, Gertrude

is determined to become famous.
The linked elements in the parallel example are both prepositional phrases. (You
don’t really need to know the grammatical term.) If you say the underlined sections
aloud, your ear tells you that they match. In the nonparallel sentence, the first ele-
ment is just a description, but the second contains a subject-verb combo that could
stand alone as a complete sentence. Clearly these two aren’t going to make it through
dinner and a movie. Nor can you correct the problem by deleting she from the non-
parallel sentence, because then you’re pairing a description with a verb. Divorce
court looms!
A good way to check parallelism in this sort of sentence is to underline the elements,
as I do in the preceding example sentences. Then you can focus on whether or not
they match.
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Chapter 18: Practicing Parallel Structure
Parallel or nonparallel? Take a look at the following sentences. If they’re parallel, write
“correct” in the blanks. If they aren’t, correct them.
Q. The bird both swooping over my head and the surprise in the garbage pail startled me.
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A. Both the bird that swooped over my head and the surprise that I found in the garbage
pail startled me. In the original sentence, swooping over my head and surprise in the
garbage pail don’t match. The first element has a verb (swooping), and the second
doesn’t. The corrected version matches bird that swooped to surprise that I found.
31. When she traveled to the biker convention, Lola intended to show off both her new Harley
and to display her new tattoo.
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32. Either Lulu would accompany Lola or stay home to work on a screenplay about bikers.
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33. Neither Lulu plans ahead nor Lola.
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34. Lola not only writes screenplays about bikers but about alien invasions also.
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35. Lulu both is jealous of Lola’s writing talent and the award for “best cycle” on Lola’s
trophy wall.
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36. Lola scorns not only awards but also refuses to enter most contests.
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37. Neither the cycling award nor the trophy for largest tattoo has significance for Lola.
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38. Lulu, on the other hand, both wants the cycling award and the trophy.
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39. Not only did Lulu bribe the judges, but also ran a full-page ad bragging about herself.
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40. The judges were either unimpressed with Lulu’s efforts or liked Lola better.
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Calling All Overachievers: Extra

Practice with Parallels
Look for any parallelism problems in this letter to an elected official from an unfortu-
nate citizen (see Figure 18-1). You should find ten mistakes in parallelism, various
shifts, and conjunction pairs. When you find a mistake, correct it.
Dear Mr. Mayor:
I do not like complaining or to be a nuisance, but if a person is
persecuted, they should be heard. As you know, the proposed new
highway not only runs through my living room but into my swimming pool
as well. When I spoke to the Department of Highways, the clerk was rude
and that he took my complaint lightly. He said I should either be glad the
road didn’t touch the breakfast nook or the kitchen. I demand that the
issue be taken seriously by you. I have written to you three times already,
and you will say that you are “working on the problem.” I am angry and in
the mood to take legal action. Moving the highway or to cancel it entirely
is the only solution. I expect you to cooperate and that you will fire the
clerk.
Sincerely,
Joshua Hickman
Figure 18-1:
A disgrun-
tled citizen
writes
a letter that
is unpar-
alleled.
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Chapter 18: Practicing Parallel Structure

Answers to Parallelism Problems
a
The ski pants that Robert favors are green, skin tight, and stretchy. The original sentence
links two adjectives (green and skin-tight) with a verb form (made of stretch fabric). Two adjec-
tives + one verb form = penalty box. The corrected version relies on three adjectives (green,
skin-tight, and stretchy) to describe Robert’s favorite pants. (In case you’re wondering why he
finds it hard to get a date, think about his wardrobe.)
b
When he eases into those pants and zips up with great difficulty, Robert feels cool. The origi-
nal sentence isn’t parallel because the and joins two verbs (eases and zipping) that don’t match.
In the corrected version, and links eases and zips. In fact, these verb forms are so well suited to
each other that they planned a date for Saturday night. Another possible correction: Easing into
those pants and zipping up with great difficulty, Robert feels cool. Now easing parallels zipping.
c
In this ski outfit, Robert can breathe only with great difficulty and loudness. The original
sentence matches up difficulty (a noun) and loudly (a description). These two are headed for
the divorce court. The correction pairs two nouns (difficulty and loudness).
d
The sacrifice for the sake of fashion is worth the trouble and discomfort, Robert says. The
clunker (the original sentence) joins a noun, trouble, and a whole clause (that’s the grammar
term for a subject/verb combo), how he feels uncomfortable. Not parallel! The correction links
two nouns, trouble and discomfort.
e
correct. The sentence yokes two -ing forms (sliding and coasting). Verdict: legal.
f
Robert has often been known to object to secondhand clothing and used equipment. You’re
okay with two nouns (clothing and equipment). You’re not okay with a noun (clothing) and a
clause (how some equipment is used), which is what you had in the original sentence.
g
“With a good parka or a warm face mask, I’m ready for anything,” he says. The or in the orig-

inal sentence links with a good parka and wearing a warm face mask. The second term includes
a verb form (wearing), and the first doesn’t, so you know that the parallelism is off. In the cor-
rection, parka and face mask are linked. Because they’re both nouns, the parallelism works.
h
The face mask is useful on the slopes and does double duty in bank robberies. The original
sentence isn’t parallel because is useful and doing don’t match. The corrected sentence pairs is
and does, two verbs, so it’s fine.
i
The ski pants can also be recycled, if they are ripless and clean. Ripless is an adjective, but
without stains is a phrase. Penalty box! The corrected version has two adjectives (ripless and
clean).
j
However, bank robbery and simple street muggings are more difficult in ski pants. In the
correction I match two nouns (robbery and muggings), but you could also go for two infinitives
(to rob a bank and to mug someone). Just be sure the two subjects have the same grammatical
identity.
k
Robbers need speed and privacy, but they also need pockets. The original sentence falls off
the parallel tracks because speed is a noun and to be private is an infinitive. The correction
joins two nouns, speed and privacy.
l
How to stash stolen money and where to put an unwanted ski mask are important issues.
In the correction, the subjects are both clauses; that is, they’re both expressions containing
subjects and verbs. (Think of a clause as a mini-sentence that can sometimes, but not always,
stand alone.) Two clauses = legal pairing. The original sentence derails because the first subject
(stashing stolen money) is a gerund, and the second is based on an infinitive (to put).
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m

Robert, who is actually quite honest and not inclined to rob anyone, nevertheless thinks
about crime and fashion. The original sentence links a plain-vanilla-no-sprinkles description
(honest) with an -ing verb form (not having the inclination to rob anyone). No sale. The answer
matches two descriptions, honest and inclined.
n
He once wrote and edited a newsletter called Crimes of Fashion. The answer matches two
past tense verbs, wrote and edited. The original matched a past (wrote) and a past perfect (had
edited) without any valid reason for a different tense, so it wasn’t parallel.
o
To ski and to pursue a career in law enforcement are Robert’s dreams. Pair two infinitives (to
ski and to pursue) and you’re fine. Or, pair skiing and pursuing for an alternate correct answer.
p
If you’ve studied biology, you know that a person must learn the names of hundreds, if
not thousands, of organisms. The original sentence shifts from anyone (third person) to you
(second person). The correction stays in second. Another possible fix pairs anyone with he or
she knows — all third-person forms.
q
correct. Two questions. No shifts, no problem.
r
The Amoeba Family provides a good example of the process, so I will explain its name. The
original sentence shifts unnecessarily from active (provides) to passive (will be explained). The
corrected sentence stays in active voice. True, it contains a shift from third person (talking
about the Amoeba Family) to first, but that shift is justified by meaning.
s
You may not know that the first example of this single-celled organism was named Amy.
The original sentence shifts inappropriately from present tense (may not know) to conditional
(would have). The tenses in the correction make more sense; the first part is present and the
second past, because you may not know right now about something that happened previously.
The shift is there, but it’s justified by meaning. The correction has another shift, also justified,
from active (may not know) to passive (was named). Because the person giving the name is

unknown, the passive must be used.
t
When they split in half, the new organisms name themselves. The question sentence is non-
parallel because it moves from the second person you to the third person organisms. The cor-
rection stays in third person (talking about someone), with they and organisms.
u
The right half of Amy still called herself Amy, but the left half now called herself Bea. In the
original, the extra by in the first half of the sentence unbalances the sentence. The correction
eliminated the problem by making both parts of the sentence active.
v
The next time Amy and Bea split, they formed four new organisms. Parallel statements
should stay in one person, in this case third person, talking about Amy, Bea, and they.
w
No one can imagine a conference between four single-celled organisms unless he or she wit-
nesses it. The issue here is singular/plural pronouns. The original sentence begins with the sin-
gular no one and then shifts illegally to they, a plural. The correction begins with singular (no
one again) and stays singular (he or she).
x
Amy Right Half favored a name that people would notice. The first verb in the original is
past, but the second shifts illogically to the future. Penalty box. In the correction, the past tense
favored is matched with a conditional (would notice), but that change is logical because Amy is
attaching a condition to her choice of name.
y
Amy Left Half thought about the choice for so long that she neglected her swimming. Why
change from active (thought) to passive (was neglected)? Two actives work better.
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